"FRACTURED FAMILY"
FRACTURED FAMILY
"THE IMPACT OF PARASITISM AND SYMBIOSIS ON FAMILY DYNAMICS"
PARASITISM:
1: The behavior of a parasite
2: An intimate association between organisms of two or more kinds
especially : one in which a parasite obtains benefits from host which it usually injures.
SYMBIOSIS:
The living together in more or less intimate association or close union of two dissimilar organisms (as in parasitism or commensalism)
especially : mutualism
2: A cooperative relationship (as between two persons or groups); for instance, the symbiosis … between the resident population and the immigrants
COMMENSALISM:
A relation between two kinds of organisms in which one obtains food or other benefits from the other without damaging or benefiting it
FAMILY DYNAMICS:
Family dynamics refers to the patterns of interactions, relationships, and roles within a family unit. These dynamics shape how family members communicate, make decisions, and express affection, influencing their individual and collective well-being.
INTERACTIONS AND RELATIONSHIPS :
Family dynamics encompass the ways family members interact with one another, including communication styles, conflict resolution, and how they show affection. These interactions can be healthy and supportive, or unhealthy and even dysfunctional.
ROLES AND RESPONSIBILITIES:
Each family member often takes on specific roles (like the "hero," "scapegoat," or "caretaker") that can impact the family's overall functioning. These roles can be conscious or unconscious and can shift over time.
In dysfunctional family systems, the "Hero," "Scapegoat," and "Caretaker" are common roles that individuals adopt to cope with unhealthy dynamics. The Hero strives for success and perfection to mask the family's problems, the Scapegoat is blamed for family issues, and the Caretaker (or Enabler) prioritizes the needs of others, often at their own expense.
ELABORATION:
HERO:
This person often feels pressure to achieve and maintain a positive image for the family. They might be high-achievers, perfectionists, or workaholics, constantly striving for validation and attempting to prove that the family is "normal" despite underlying issues.
SCAPEGOAT:
The Scapegoat is often the target of blame and negative attention. They may act out, challenge authority, or become the focus of family conflict, essentially diverting attention from the real problems within the family system.
CARETAKER:
The Caretaker often takes on the role of the peacemaker, trying to maintain a sense of balance and stability within the family. They might enable the behaviors of other family members, especially those struggling with addiction or other issues, and prioritize the needs of others over their own. These roles can develop as a way for individuals to survive and navigate dysfunctional family dynamics, but they can also have long-lasting negative consequences for mental and emotional well-being.
FACTORS INFLUENCING DYNAMICS:
Family dynamics are shaped by various factors, including individual personalities, family history, cultural background, and life experiences. They can also be influenced by external factors like socioeconomic
status and societal norms.
IMPACT ON WELL-BEING:
Positive family dynamics can foster resilience, promote mental and physical health, and provide a sense of belonging. Healthy family relationships can be a source of strength and support. Conversely, negative or dysfunctional dynamics can contribute to stress, conflict, and mental health challenges.
EXAMPLES OF DYNAMICS:
Family dynamics can range from highly cohesive and supportive to conflicted and chaotic. Some families may have strong traditions and rituals, while others may be more flexible and adaptable.
"Ijebuonwu's family is no exception to the rule. Its existence has been shaped and influenced by the aforementioned factors, resulting in an overflow of negative emotions such as envy, hatred, covetousness, mistrust, resentment, rancor, acrimony, malice, malevolence, and bitterness, among others." "It is not my wish to curate and couch sweet words to please the readers or my audience, but rather an effort to weave a fact-based and real narrative on family dynamics."
Fractured Family is both memoir and reflection, a tapestry woven with threads of grief, betrayal,resilience, and truth. It chronicles not just events, but their meanings; not only betrayals but also the lessons hidden within them.
" No one is more hated than he who speaks the truth ."-Plato
" This even-handed justice commends the ingredients of our poisoned chalice to our own lips." - Macbeth [William Shakespeare]
DEDICATION
"To my beloved and benevolent grandmother- Dame Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu-, whose boundless love, wisdom, and legacy continue to inspire me. Your memory lives on in my heart, and I hope this story does justice to the impact you have had on my life."You, who has shown me the true meaning of resilience, love, and determination. May this story honor your legacy and inspire future generations."
KNOWLEDGEMENT
"I would like to extend my deepest gratitude to my family, friends, and loved ones who have supported me throughout the writing of this novelette. Your encouragement, patience, and understanding have been invaluable.
To those who shared their own stories and experiences with me, I am forever grateful. Your insights and perspectives have enriched this story and given it depth.
To the team who worked tirelessly to bring this novelette to life, thank you for your dedication and expertise. Your passion for storytelling is contagious, and I am honored to have worked alongside you.
And to my grandmother, whose legacy inspired this story, I hope I have done your memory justice. Your love, wisdom, and strength continue to guide me, and I strive to make you proud."
PREFACE
"In the midst of love and legacy, a family's history is woven with threads of joy, sorrow, and resilience. This story is a testament to the enduring power of family's bonds, the weight of secrets, and the complexities of human relationships.
Through the eyes of a truthful and devoted grandchild, we witness the life and legacy of a remarkable matriarch, whose strength and determination shaped the lives of those around her. As the family navigates the aftermath of her passing, old wounds resurface, and new conflicts arise, threatening to tear them apart.
This novelette is a tribute to the matriarch's life, an exploration of the intricate web of a family's dynamics, and a reflection on the enduring impact of love, loss, and legacy."
The old house stands tall, its walls bearing witness to generations of laughter, tears, and secrets. It was a place where memories were woven into the fabric of everyday's life, where the past and present collided in whispers and echoes hoping to shape and influence the future.
In this house, a matriarch had lived a life of love, sacrifice, and triumph. She had guided her family through times of joy and turmoil, her presence a steady heartbeat that had sustained them all.
As the sun set on her final day, the family gathered around her, their faces etched with love, concern, and uncertainty. The matriarch's eyes, once bright with warmth and wisdom, grew dim, but her spirit remained strong, a flame that would continue to burn long after she was gone.
The legacy she left behind would be complex, multifaceted, and sometimes painful. But one thing is certain: her family would never be the same again. The question is , would they be able to hold on to the love and lessons she has given them, or would the weight of their own flaws and fears tear them apart?
**** FRACTURED FAMILY****
TABLE OF CONTENTS
*Chapter 1:* Roots of Legacy*
"RECENSION"
"May Mama’s soul continue to rest in peace. Beautiful writeup".- Olivia Chinyere Emeruem
"It is still surreal. The flashbacks keep coming back in successions. I still hear her voice in my head. I see her pictures and feel like she is still just a call away.
"May Mama’s soul continue to rest in peace. Beautiful writeup".- Olivia Chinyere Emeruem
"It is still surreal. The flashbacks keep coming back in successions. I still hear her voice in my head. I see her pictures and feel like she is still just a call away.
"A brother who is at war with himself lacks the moral standard to broker peace outside or convoke a general family assembly to pontificate about peace when his kitchen is in tatters."-Princeclintonuzohr
This is my favourite line from this piece. The Holy Bible refers to such character as worse than an infidel. A na-amara nma si n'ụlọ pụta ama(Charity begins at home)."- Adaeze Barbara Akachi
"Nice Piece, though very long to make a book" - Uchehy Duncan Nwazue
"Nice Piece, though very long to make a book" - Uchehy Duncan Nwazue
"His truth shall be your shield and buckler. Posterity demands a witness and this book is my witness. It is written neither to judge, revenge nor condemn, but to preserve a family's history, truth and trust which are distorted, broken and betrayed respectively". -Princeclintonuzohr
Psalm11:3, "If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do?" "Eziokwu bu(Truth is life)ndu. All the things the author wrote is nothing but the truth. Mama would not be easily forgotten. She prayed for her children and grandchildren, and always blessed them. She also wished them well all the time. Mama's light is still shining every day in my heart . I thank the storywriter for revealing many hidden things that I do not know in this book . She is resting in peace with the Lord. Praise the Lord Amen."- Elizabeth Ejituru Onyeneho
"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself" - Franklin D. Roosevelt.
" Man's heart is more evil,and destructive than atomic and nuclear bomb".- Princeclintonuzohr
"AUTHOR'S COMMENT"
"THE IMPACT OF PARASITISM AND SYMBIOSIS ON FAMILY DYNAMICS"
PARASITISM:
1: The behavior of a parasite
2: An intimate association between organisms of two or more kinds
especially : one in which a parasite obtains benefits from host which it usually injures.
SYMBIOSIS:
The living together in more or less intimate association or close union of two dissimilar organisms (as in parasitism or commensalism)
especially : mutualism
2: A cooperative relationship (as between two persons or groups); for instance, the symbiosis … between the resident population and the immigrants
COMMENSALISM:
A relation between two kinds of organisms in which one obtains food or other benefits from the other without damaging or benefiting it
FAMILY DYNAMICS:
Family dynamics refers to the patterns of interactions, relationships, and roles within a family unit. These dynamics shape how family members communicate, make decisions, and express affection, influencing their individual and collective well-being.
INTERACTIONS AND RELATIONSHIPS :
Family dynamics encompass the ways family members interact with one another, including communication styles, conflict resolution, and how they show affection. These interactions can be healthy and supportive, or unhealthy and even dysfunctional.
ROLES AND RESPONSIBILITIES:
Each family member often takes on specific roles (like the "hero," "scapegoat," or "caretaker") that can impact the family's overall functioning. These roles can be conscious or unconscious and can shift over time.
In dysfunctional family systems, the "Hero," "Scapegoat," and "Caretaker" are common roles that individuals adopt to cope with unhealthy dynamics. The Hero strives for success and perfection to mask the family's problems, the Scapegoat is blamed for family issues, and the Caretaker (or Enabler) prioritizes the needs of others, often at their own expense.
ELABORATION:
HERO:
This person often feels pressure to achieve and maintain a positive image for the family. They might be high-achievers, perfectionists, or workaholics, constantly striving for validation and attempting to prove that the family is "normal" despite underlying issues.
SCAPEGOAT:
The Scapegoat is often the target of blame and negative attention. They may act out, challenge authority, or become the focus of family conflict, essentially diverting attention from the real problems within the family system.
CARETAKER:
The Caretaker often takes on the role of the peacemaker, trying to maintain a sense of balance and stability within the family. They might enable the behaviors of other family members, especially those struggling with addiction or other issues, and prioritize the needs of others over their own. These roles can develop as a way for individuals to survive and navigate dysfunctional family dynamics, but they can also have long-lasting negative consequences for mental and emotional well-being.
FACTORS INFLUENCING DYNAMICS:
Family dynamics are shaped by various factors, including individual personalities, family history, cultural background, and life experiences. They can also be influenced by external factors like socioeconomic
status and societal norms.
IMPACT ON WELL-BEING:
Positive family dynamics can foster resilience, promote mental and physical health, and provide a sense of belonging. Healthy family relationships can be a source of strength and support. Conversely, negative or dysfunctional dynamics can contribute to stress, conflict, and mental health challenges.
EXAMPLES OF DYNAMICS:
Family dynamics can range from highly cohesive and supportive to conflicted and chaotic. Some families may have strong traditions and rituals, while others may be more flexible and adaptable.
"Ijebuonwu's family is no exception to the rule. Its existence has been shaped and influenced by the aforementioned factors, resulting in an overflow of negative emotions such as envy, hatred, covetousness, mistrust, resentment, rancor, acrimony, malice, malevolence, and bitterness, among others." "It is not my wish to curate and couch sweet words to please the readers or my audience, but rather an effort to weave a fact-based and real narrative on family dynamics."
" Man's heart is more evil, dangerous and destructive than atomic and nuclear bomb".- Princeclintonuzohr
In telling this story, I seek not revenge, but remembrance. I seek not to condemn, but to shine a light where silence has too long prevailed.
To every broken heart, every betrayed trust, and every voice silenced in the storm. This book is dedicated to the resilience of family to the pursuit of justice, and to Truth for Posterity.
The pages that follow are not written merely for memory’s sake, but to preserve the truth of a family’s story- truth fractured, truth betrayed, yet truth that endures.
May those who read find healing, and may those who hear these words remember that truth, however fractured will always find its voice.
Posterity demands a witness, and this book is my witness.
"NOTICE: This book, "FRACTURED FAMILY", is a true story based on real family dynamics. All settings, characters, and events are factual. Reader discretion is advised, as the content may be sensitive.
INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY RIGHTS
This book is protected by copyright law. No part of this book may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, without prior written permission from the author.
PUBLISHER:
PCUZIREACHY MULTI-VENTURES
PcuzireachyMulti-Ventures@hotmail.com
Pcuzireachy multiventures@gmail.com
First edition, 2025"
INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY RIGHTS
This book is protected by copyright law. No part of this book may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, without prior written permission from the author.
PUBLISHER:
PCUZIREACHY MULTI-VENTURES
PcuzireachyMulti-Ventures@hotmail.com
Pcuzireachy multiventures@gmail.com
First edition, 2025"
"The further a society drifts from the truth, the more it will hate those that speak it."-
Selwyn Duke" No one is more hated than he who speaks the truth ."-Plato
" This even-handed justice commends the ingredients of our poisoned chalice to our own lips." - Macbeth [William Shakespeare]
DEDICATION
"To my beloved and benevolent grandmother- Dame Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu-, whose boundless love, wisdom, and legacy continue to inspire me. Your memory lives on in my heart, and I hope this story does justice to the impact you have had on my life."You, who has shown me the true meaning of resilience, love, and determination. May this story honor your legacy and inspire future generations."
KNOWLEDGEMENT
"I would like to extend my deepest gratitude to my family, friends, and loved ones who have supported me throughout the writing of this novelette. Your encouragement, patience, and understanding have been invaluable.
To those who shared their own stories and experiences with me, I am forever grateful. Your insights and perspectives have enriched this story and given it depth.
To the team who worked tirelessly to bring this novelette to life, thank you for your dedication and expertise. Your passion for storytelling is contagious, and I am honored to have worked alongside you.
And to my grandmother, whose legacy inspired this story, I hope I have done your memory justice. Your love, wisdom, and strength continue to guide me, and I strive to make you proud."
PREFACE
"In the midst of love and legacy, a family's history is woven with threads of joy, sorrow, and resilience. This story is a testament to the enduring power of family's bonds, the weight of secrets, and the complexities of human relationships.
Through the eyes of a truthful and devoted grandchild, we witness the life and legacy of a remarkable matriarch, whose strength and determination shaped the lives of those around her. As the family navigates the aftermath of her passing, old wounds resurface, and new conflicts arise, threatening to tear them apart.
This novelette is a tribute to the matriarch's life, an exploration of the intricate web of a family's dynamics, and a reflection on the enduring impact of love, loss, and legacy."
The old house stands tall, its walls bearing witness to generations of laughter, tears, and secrets. It was a place where memories were woven into the fabric of everyday's life, where the past and present collided in whispers and echoes hoping to shape and influence the future.
In this house, a matriarch had lived a life of love, sacrifice, and triumph. She had guided her family through times of joy and turmoil, her presence a steady heartbeat that had sustained them all.
As the sun set on her final day, the family gathered around her, their faces etched with love, concern, and uncertainty. The matriarch's eyes, once bright with warmth and wisdom, grew dim, but her spirit remained strong, a flame that would continue to burn long after she was gone.
The legacy she left behind would be complex, multifaceted, and sometimes painful. But one thing is certain: her family would never be the same again. The question is , would they be able to hold on to the love and lessons she has given them, or would the weight of their own flaws and fears tear them apart?
**** FRACTURED FAMILY****
TABLE OF CONTENTS
*Chapter 1:* Roots of Legacy*
- Introduces the Patriarch and his background.
*A Legacy of Resilience*
*A Legacy of Resilience*
- Introduces the matriarch and her background.
- Describes her challenges and triumphs as a single mother.
- Shows her dedication to her children's education and well-being.
*Chapter 2: *The Family's Rise*
- Describes the children's successes and achievements.
- Introduces my father and his journey.
- Shows the matriarch's support for Orisa's academic pursuits in the US.
*Chapter 3: *Tensions Rise*
- Introduces the family's feud over the matriarch's wealth and pension
- Describes the allegations of restriction and control
- Shows the impact on family relationships and dynamics
*Chapter 4: *The Matriarch's Final Days*
- Describe the matriarch's declining health
- Show the family's reactions and conflicts
- Set the stage for the aftermath of her passing
*Chapter 5: Passing the Torch*
- Describes the matriarch's passing on November 19th, 2024
- Explores the family's reactions and grief
- Introduces the central issue of the pension and life insurance policy
*Chapter 6: Legacy and Conflict*
- Describe the family's struggle to come to terms with the matriarch's passing
- Explore the conflicts and power struggles over her legacy
- Set the stage for the future of the family relationships and dynamics
Chapter 7: *A Bitter End*
- shades light on the controversy over honoring the matriarch's dying wishes.
-The roles of the protagonists who disregarded the matriarch's wishes
Chapter 8: *A Legacy of Pain and
- Shows her dedication to her children's education and well-being.
*Chapter 2: *The Family's Rise*
- Describes the children's successes and achievements.
- Introduces my father and his journey.
- Shows the matriarch's support for Orisa's academic pursuits in the US.
*Chapter 3: *Tensions Rise*
- Introduces the family's feud over the matriarch's wealth and pension
- Describes the allegations of restriction and control
- Shows the impact on family relationships and dynamics
*Chapter 4: *The Matriarch's Final Days*
- Describe the matriarch's declining health
- Show the family's reactions and conflicts
- Set the stage for the aftermath of her passing
*Chapter 5: Passing the Torch*
- Describes the matriarch's passing on November 19th, 2024
- Explores the family's reactions and grief
- Introduces the central issue of the pension and life insurance policy
*Chapter 6: Legacy and Conflict*
- Describe the family's struggle to come to terms with the matriarch's passing
- Explore the conflicts and power struggles over her legacy
- Set the stage for the future of the family relationships and dynamics
Chapter 7: *A Bitter End*
- shades light on the controversy over honoring the matriarch's dying wishes.
-The roles of the protagonists who disregarded the matriarch's wishes
Chapter 8: *A Legacy of Pain and
Disinheritance*
- delves into the reasons behind the matriarch's will and the reactions of family members.
Chapter 9: * Betrayal of Trust*
Chapter 9: * Betrayal of Trust*
- Explains the depth of betrayal suffered by the matriarch from those she loved, cherished and trusted.
Chapter 10: * Tributes*
Chapter 10: * Tributes*
Examines and displays the depth of loss, emptiness and grief suffered by the bereaved as a result of the death of loved ones through their Elegies.
Chapter 11: * Lamentations and Open letters*
- explores the antagonists' efforts towards the protagonists to persuade them to honor and uphold the matriarch's dying wishes.
Chapter 1: *Roots of Legacy*
As the sun dipped into the horizon, casting a warm orange glow over the small village of Umuobasi-Isiama Afara-Ukwu in Ibeku nestled in the midst of metropolis of Umuahia. The air was alive with the scent of blooming flowers and the distant hum of cicadas. In a small compound, surrounded by lush greenery, late Adolphus Nwazue Ijebuonwu sat on his porch, his eyes fixed on the fading light.
As the patriarch of the Ijebuonwu's family, he had lived through the ebbs and flows of life, witnessing the beauty and struggles of his community. His wife, Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu, emerged from the kitchenette with a gentle smile on her face, and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Adolphus, dinner is ready. The children are waiting," she said, her voice soft and melodious.
He turned to her, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Thank you, my dear. I will be right there."
As he stood up, his joints creaked slightly, a reminder of his advancing age. He took her hand, and together they walked into the warm glow of the kitchenette. The aroma of freshly cooked yam and vegetable soup filled the air, making his stomach growl with anticipation.
Their children, ranging in age from toddlers to teenagers, chattered excitedly around the dinner table. His eyes sparkled as he surveyed his family. There were Alice, Ejituruonwu, Eberechukwu ,Robinson, Chile the eldest, with his serious demeanor and sharp mind; Nneoma, the gentle soul with a heart full of love; and the younger ones, full of energy and curiosity.
As they sat down to eat, he cleared his throat. "Tonight, I want to share a story with you all," he said, his voice filled with a mix of nostalgia and gravity. "A story about our ancestors, about where we come from, and about the struggles they faced."
The children leaned in, their eyes wide with interest. My granny smiled, knowing that he loved sharing stories of their heritage.
"In the olden days," he began, "our people were known for their bravery and resilience. They faced many challenges, from wars to famines, but they persevered. And through it all, they held on to their traditions and values."
As my grandpa spoke, the room seemed to fade away, and the children were transported to a different time, a time of heroes and legends. They listened with rapt attention, their imaginations running wild.
Robinson, the eldest child of my granny and my father , felt a sense of pride and responsibility washed over him. He knew that one day, he would be the one to carry on the family's legacy at his own mother's kitchen.
The story would continue, but for now, the family sat in comfortable silence, the only sound was the clinking of utensils against plates.
As the night wore on, the family finished their meal and began to disperse. The younger children were excused to play outside, while the older ones helped with the dishes. My grandfather and my granny sat on the porch, watching the stars twinkle to life in the night sky.
My dad, feeling a sense of restlessness, excused himself and walked out into the darkness. He strolled through the village, taking in the sights and sounds of the evening. The air was filled with the scent of wood smoke and the distant sound of drums.
As he walked, he came across a group of young men gathered around a makeshift board, playing a game of ajwa. He watched for a moment, then joined in, his competitive spirit piqued.
Meanwhile, back at the compound, Ejituruonwu sat with her mother, learning the intricacies of traditional weaving. Granny's hands moved deftly, the shuttle flying back and forth as she worked the loom.
"Tell me, Eji," she said, "what do you want to be when you grow up?"
She thought for a moment before answering. "I want to be a great weaver, like you, mother. I love the way the threads come together to create something beautiful."
She smiled, her eyes shining with pride. "You have a good eye for design, Eji, I think you would make a fine weaver."
As the night wore on, the family slowly drifted back to their compound, tired but content. Grandpa and granny sat on their porch, watching their children sleep, feeling grateful for the blessings they had received.
The next morning, the family gathered for breakfast, the atmosphere lively with chatter and laughter. Grandpa smiled, feeling a sense of peace washed over him. This was what life was all about – family, community, and tradition.
Grandpa's eyes, though warm with family, held deep lines, etched by the weight of his past. As a police inspector in the defunct Eastern Region's Government, he had navigated the complex web of politics and justice. But it was his experience in the Nigerian civil war, aka Nigerian -Biafran war that left the most profound scars.
The war had torn families apart, leaving deep wounds that would take generations to heal. He, a soldier fighting for Biafra's independence, had seen the worst of humanity. The memories of fallen comrades, civilian casualties, and the screams of the wounded still haunted him.
After the war, he returned home, his heart heavy with the knowledge that his sacrifices might have been in vain. He resumed his role as a family man, but the pain of the war lingered, a constant reminder of the fragility of life.
As a polygamist, he had multiple wives, each with her own story and struggles. My grandmother, the second wife, played a significant role in the family's dynamics. Her strength and resilience in the face of adversity inspired the other wives and children.
The family's compound became a sanctuary, a place where my grandpa could find solace amidst the chaos of his past. His children grew, each carrying their own piece of his legacy.
But his time was running out. The war had taken its toll on his health, and he knew his days were numbered. He focused on passing down his values, traditions, and stories to his children, hoping they would learn from his experiences.
The year was 1970, and his health began to decline rapidly. The family gathered around him, sensing the end was near. He communicated and instructed his eldest daughter Alice where he wished his remains to be laid to rest after he joined his ancestors. His dying wish was upheld irrespective of the fact that his daughter was a woman among his male children. Igbo tradition or culture never frowned at this decision.
*Abandoned Legacy*
Before the war, he settled in Port Harcourt, where he built a meaningful life and amassed a considerable fortune. He invested in properties, businesses, and traded goods, becoming a respected figure in the community.
However, the Federal Military Government, under the leadership of Colonel Olusegun Obasanjo and General Murtala Muhammed, but more prominently associated with General Yakubu Gowon during the civil war era, introduced the Abandoned Property Policy. This policy allowed the government to seize properties deemed abandoned, often targeting properties owned by Igbo people who had fled during the war.
He, having fought on the side of Biafra, found himself vulnerable to this policy. Despite his efforts to rebuild his life, the government seized his properties, businesses, and assets, leaving him with little more than the clothes on his back and 20 pounds to resuscitate his life.
The family struggled to make ends meet, but his spirit remained unbroken. He continued to share his stories, traditions, and values with his children, ensuring they knew their heritage.
As his health declined with chronic hiccups like my dad's, the family gathered around him, cherishing the time they had left. His passing in 1970 left a void, but his legacy lived on through his children and grandchildren.
He ruled his family with iron fist. He maltreated my granny whom He married at the tender age of 13 years from Umuhute Ndume Ibeku in Umuahia North LGA as a result of her religious persuasion. Her marriage to him hit the rock and she was sent out with only a piece of wrap to her maiden home. She actually took care of her step children [late De Chile and Da Alice] whose mother demised as a result of domestic voilence from their father.
*A Legacy of Resilience*
In the heart of Ndume Ibeku, is Umuhute a village nestled in the rolling hills and lush vale of Abia State, Nigeria, a remarkable woman named Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu [Williams Ezocha nee] lived a life marked by trials and triumphs. Born into a family that would eventually turn its back on her, she rose above adversity, determined to build a better life for herself and her children.
My grandmother, a damsel from Umuhute Ndume Ibeku was married to my grandpa and moved into his household. She took on the responsibility of caring for her stepchildren, De Chile Ijebuonwu of the blessed memory and Da Alice Ukauwa who had lost their mother to domestic violence.
As she navigated her new role, she faced challenges in her marriage due to her religious persuasion. Despite these difficulties, she devoted herself to her stepchildren and her own offspring , providing them with love and care. She got divorced and was sent away with only a piece of wrapper, faced immense challenges as a lactating mother. Despite the hardships, she relied on her skills as a seamstress and her entrepreneurial spirit to care for her children.
Her ardent faith played a significant role in her life, and she often sought God's intervention, especially when she was struggling to conceive again. The birth of Uncle Orisa, which she attributed to God's intervention, brought her immense joy.
As a young woman, she faced unimaginable challenges, from being divorced, disinherited to being abandoned by her husband. Yet, she persevered, relying on her strength and resourcefulness to provide for her children. Her determination and love for her family drove her to work tirelessly, but diligently and she eventually found employment at Queen Elizabeth Hospital [now Federal Medical Center] in Umuahia.
Despite the odds against her, she excelled in her roles, first as an orderly, then as a seamstress in the matron's office, and even as a cook in the hospital's kitchen. Her versatility and work ethics earned her the respect and admiration of her colleagues and superiors. She established meaningful connections with her colleagues like Christie, Ezediokpo, Ada, Nnadi and host of others.
My father, was guided by her through various vocational schools, and with the help of late mr. Alex Onwuzuruigbo, he secured a job at Golden Guinea Breweries LTD. Another son of hers, Orisa aka Chizuorum, was supported in his academic pursuits, even receiving assistance while studying at Lincoln University in the United States.
She got superannuated in 1992 with gratiuity of only 20 thousand Naira. Her pensions from both federal and state governments were meagre. Her retirement marked a new chapter in her life. Despite receiving a modest pension and gratuity, she remained active and focused on building a better life for herself and her family. She invested in her plot of land, developing it into a home where she lived until her passing. This accomplishment showcased her determination and resourcefulness, even in retirement.
She remained energetic and motivated, continuing to build a legacy for her family.
Her story serves as an inspiration, highlighting the importance of resilience, hard work, and determination.
The matriarch's own journey took her to the United States, where she lived and worked for nearly a decade, earning her naturalization and a pension. Her life became a testament to resilience and determination.
However, as her children grew and prospered, tensions arose over her wealth and pension. Allegations of restriction and control would test the bonds of family and legacy, leaving a complex web of emotions and conflict in its wake.
*Chapter 2: *The Family's Rise*
As the matriarch's career flourished, her children began to reap the benefits of her hard work and determination. She sent Auntie Eberechukwu to the prestigious Queen Elizabeth Nursing School in Umuahia, where she trained to become a nurse. She guided, directed and guarded my dad through various vocational schools, and with the assistance of mr. Alex Onwuzuruigbo of blessed memory she secured a job for him at Golden Guinea Breweries LTD.
Uncle Orisa, another son of hers was supported in his academic pursuits, and his mother's sacrifices paid off when he earned a spot at Lincoln University in the United States. The matriarch's own journey took her to the US, where she lived and worked for nearly a decade, earning her naturalization and a pension.
Through her children's successes, the matriarch's legacy began to take shape. She had built a better life for herself and her family, despite the challenges she faced. Her determination and resilience had paid off, and her children were thriving.
As the family prospered, they began to make a name for themselves in their community. The matriarch's children became respected members of society, and their mother's sacrifices were not forgotten.
But as the family's wealth and influence grew, so did the tensions and conflicts that would eventually tear them apart.
*Chapter 3: *Tensions Rise*
The matriarch's children grew older and more successful, tensions began to rise within the family. Ebere and Orisa, who had benefited greatly from their mother's support, seemed to have a different vision for her finances. They allegedly restricted her access to her own money, limiting her ability to assist other family members.
My father, who had been guided by his mother's determination and resourcefulness, watched the unfolding drama with a mix of sadness and concern. He knew his mother's strength and resilience, but he also understood the complexities of family dynamics.
My uncle's wife, Victoria Orisa Carl Ijebuonwu was a side chick who cast a dark shadow in his previous marriage to Blessing Ijeoma Chibo Ijebuonwu. She had a liaison with him while he was still legally married to Blessing. Blessing fought frantically to save her marriage by matchmaking her husband's paramour but all to no avail. She eventually catalyzed the crash of her marriage and wove her way into the family via her infamous nuptials with my uncle.
After my uncle's ultra-modern house was completed, he invited the matriarch to live with him, promising her a better life. However, she was hesitant and unsure about leaving her home. Most family members supported her decision to decline the offer, but he insisted that she would love the new place.
When I visited home, he asked me to persuade her to reconsider. I spoke with her, and she agreed to move in only if he would promise not to mistreat her. She demanded a written undertaking to ensure her well-being. I relayed her conditions to him , and he assured me he would be kind and gentle.
Despite his promises, the matriarch's fears were confirmed after she moved in and domiciled at the so- called magnificent ,magnanimous, ventilated and fortified edifice of their domicile. She suffered maltreatment and felt trapped in her own son's home. In her words, "I was held a prisoner in my son's home."
What was more, he had ulterior motives. Behind her back, he planned to demolish her current home and build a new structure for commercial purposes, disregarding her wishes for him to inherit the property after her passing. This revelation exposed his true intentions and left the matriarch feeling betrayed.
Her maltreatment by her daughter-in-law necessited her exit from the property with the assistance of my dad but not without her uninfluenced decision, instruction and approval. Ejituru my aunt and her last daughter Chinyere with her broods who came to spend time with their great-grandmother were embrassingly ejected out of their property in the cover of darkness after a copious tirade from them which left the matriarch hysterically and inconsolably tearful till her death.
The sequence of these events impacted my granny's life negatively. Abruptly it became very palpable with the trajectory of events that there was no love lost among Lady Eberechukwu, her elder brother, and elder sister, and she had worked synergically with Chief Orisa to disregard my granny's dying will and last wish, especially where she had wished to be laid in state and interred.
The matriarch, however, remained strong and determined, refusing to let her children's disagreements define her. She continued to live life on her own terms.
*Chapter 4: *The Matriarch's Final Days*
As the matriarch's health began to decline, the family dynamics became increasingly strained. Ebere and Orisa's control over her finances became more pronounced, causing tension among the other family members.
Despite her advanced age and the challenges she faced, the matriarch remained a pillar of strength, drawing on the lessons she had learned throughout her life. She had lived a life marked by resilience and determination, and she would not let her final days be defined by the family's conflicts.
On November 19th,2024, the matriarch passed away, with her eldest son [ Chiabuotu]following suit four days later on November 23rd, 2024 leaving behind a legacy of love, resilience, and complexity. Her pension and life insurance policy, which had been a point of contention among her children, would now become a central issue in the family's struggle to come to terms with, with her passing.
*Chapter 5: *Legacy and Conflict*
The matriarch's passing marked the beginning of a new chapter in the family's history. The conflict over her pension and life insurance policy intensified, with Auntie Ebere and Uncle Orisa at the center of the dispute.
Many other family members felt excluded from the decision-making process, and tensions rose as they struggled to come to terms with the matriarch's legacy. The family's relationships and dynamics would never be the same, as they navigated the complex web of emotions and conflicts that had been building for years.
As the family struggled to find a way forward, they could not help but reflect on the matriarch's life and legacy. She had been a woman of remarkable strength and resilience, and her passing left a void that could never be filled.
The story of the matriarch and her family serves as a testament to the power of love, determination, and resilience. Despite the challenges they faced, they had built a life that would be remembered for generations to come.
*Chapter 6:* A Life Unraveled*
The matriarch's life was marked by both triumph and tragedy. Her marriage to her husband had been a significant chapter in her life, but it ultimately ended in divorce. Many suitors had sought her hand in marriage after the divorce, but her father's consultation with my father led to her decision to remain unmarried.
Her husband's family had played a significant role in her life, but the marriage had not worked out. Despite this, she had dedicated herself to raising her children and building a better life for them.
The matriarch's strength and resilience had been tested time and again, but she had always emerged stronger. Her determination to educate her children had been unwavering, and she had sacrificed much to ensure they had a brighter future.
As the family navigated the complexities of her legacy, they could not help but reflect on the matriarch's life and the choices she had made. Her story was one of love, loss, and triumph, and it would continue to inspire and shape their lives for generations to come.
The matriarch's journey had not been easy, but it had been hers, and she had lived it with courage and determination. Her legacy would live on, a testament to the power of a mother's love and the strength of the human spirit.
*Chapter 7: *A Bitter End*
The matriarch's passing was met with a mixture of grief and controversy. As the family prepared for her burial, it became clear that her final wishes would not be honored. Despite her explicit desire to be laid in state in her own living room and buried at her own compound but , Orisa and Ebere had other plans.
In a shocking move, Orisa buried their mother at his own compound, subverting her dying wishes. The decision sparked outrage and hurt among other family members, who felt that the matriarch's autonomy and dignity had been disregarded.
The burial was a contentious affair, with some family members accusing Orisa and Ebere of disrespecting their mother's wishes. The tension and conflict that had been building for years had finally boiled over, and the family was left to grapple with the consequences of their actions.
As the matriarch's body was laid to rest, the family could not help but wonder what she would have thought about the controversy surrounding her burial. Would she have been surprised by the depth of the family's divisions, or would she have expected it?
The matriarch's legacy, once marked by strength and resilience, was now tainted by the bitter end. The family's dynamics had been exposed, and the wounds would take a long time to heal. The question on everyone's mind was: what would happen next? Would the family be able to move forward, or would the matriarch's burial be a turning point in their downward spiral?
*Chapter 8: *A Legacy of Pain and
Disinheritance*
The matriarch's decision to disinherit Orisa was a culmination of years of pain and disappointment. The mismanagement of her money in their joint account with Union Bank Umuahia had been the final straw which had the camel's back shattered to smithereens.The betrayal of trust had left a deep wound, and she had chosen to sever ties with her son.
In a surprising move, the matriarch had left a will bequeathing her house to her first daughter, Ejituruonwu, and her granddaughters, Adaeze and Nneka, who are Orisa's daughters. The will came with an oral caveat that all her grandchildren and great-grandchildren should be accorded access to the property, effectively creating a life estate.
The matriarch's intention was succinctly clear: the property was to be a family's legacy, a symbol of her love and connection to her descendants. She had specifically stipulated that the property should never be sold, ensuring that it would remain in the family for generations to come.
The will sparked a mix of emotions among the family members. Some were relieved that the matriarch's wishes would be honored, while others were bitter about the disinheritance of Orisa. The question on everyone's mind was: would the family be able to respect the matriarch's wishes, or would the legacy of pain and disinheritance continue to tear them apart?
*Chapter 9: *Betrayal of Trust*
The matriarch's final wish, as stated in her will, was for her American money to be shared among Eberechukwu, Chiabuotu, Alice, and Ejituruonwu. However, it seemed that this wish would not be honored. Orisa and Eberechukwu, who were the managers of her fund, had other plans.
The family was shocked and outraged when they discovered that Orisa and Eberechukwu had ignored the matriarch's wishes. The betrayal of trust was palpable, and the family was left to wonder if anyone would be held accountable for their actions.
As the news spread, tensions rose, and conflicts escalated. The family was torn apart by accusations and recriminations, and it seemed that the matriarch's legacy was being torn apart by the very people she had trusted.
The question on everyone's mind was: would justice be served, or would the matriarch's wishes continue to be ignored? Would the family be able to come together and find a way to honor her legacy, or would the betrayal of trust tear them apart forever?
As the family navigated the complexities of the matriarch's legacy, old wounds began to resurface. The tension among Orisa, Eberechukwu and the other family members grew, fueled by the disputed will and the mismanagement of the matriarch's funds.
A deeper betrayal unfolded as Ikechukwu Christian Chiabuotu, the self-acclaimed principal grandchild, mismanaged the matriarch's funds in my joint account with them at United Bank for Africa Umuahia. This breach of trust devastated her, leaving her heartbroken and hysterically tearful. The pain was eerily reminiscent of her experience with Orisa, which had driven her to confide in her grandchildren seeking solace and safety. Unfortunately, her hopes were dashed once again.
After her passing, Ikechukwu's actions revealed a shocking hypocrisy. Despite being one of a major beneficiaries of her legacy, he disregarded her explicit wish to be laid in state and buried at her compound by her grandchildren. Instead, he cited culture and tradition as reasons to support Orisa and Eberechukwu's decision to defy her wishes.
However, his true intentions were far from noble. His actions were motivated by selfish interests, specifically to prevent Orisa from contesting the Ijebuonwu's property at Avo, where he resides. This move directly contradicted the matriarch's clear instructions before her death: "That tract of land shall be shared between Orisa and Chiabuotu."
Ikechukwu's betrayal exposed a painful truth: his loyalty was to his own selfish interests, not to the matriarch's wishes or legacy.
*Kinsmen's Betrayal*
The matriarch's final wishes were brazenly disregarded by her own kinsmen and mine who cited cultural traditions to justify their actions. Despite her clear instructions, they showed blatant favoritism towards Orisa, ignoring her desires.
In the midst of this betrayal, my aunt, Ejiutruonwu made frantic efforts to uphold the matriarch's wishes, but her attempts were met with disappointment and resistance. The family's actions left a deep wound, revealing a painful truth about where loyalty and priorities truly lay.
The aftermath of this betrayal continues to resonate, leaving questions about the true meaning of family's loyalty and the importance of honoring one's legacy.
Even some family members who had little or no knowledge of the bone of contention were involved by the party which believed its interests were at stake, but at the expense of the truth. Worse still, those who were aware of the fact of the matter either chose not to speak out or were intimidated to conceal the truth.
The efforts of Umuada[ ie married daughters of the community] towards ensuring that the matriarch's wishes would be honored were met with stiff resistance.
Meanwhile, as we grapple with the loss of our beloved grandmother. We remember her strength, her love, and her unwavering dedication to the family. We recall the stories she told, the lessons she taught, and the laughter we shared. All those who offended and disdained her were genuinely forgiven and blessed by her. What a remarkable and wonderful matriarch she was!
As the family struggles to come to terms with its grief and the conflict that had arisen, we begin to realize that our grandmother's legacy was more than just a collection of assets and properties. It is a legacy of love, resilience, and determination.
*Chapter 10: *Tributes*
ELEGY
**THE TRANSITION OF A RARE MATRIARCH CUM GEM**
As my funereal ink fluxes with heavy heart laced with magnanimity of lamentations and lachrymosity of despondency, it reminds us a la William Shakespeare "death, a necessary end, will come when it will come."
Death! You, enemy of all foes! Recumbent at every door post like a camel and with your clammy and somewhat frigid phalanges in the manner of wheels of juggernauts you clamped life out of my beloved granny on the 19th of November 2024. "Death, you are merciless and as such no respecter of persons.
Granny, I address you apostrophically though posthumously. Where art thou? Where art thou? Have your avatar embarked on peregrination to the demimonde with your residue left adrift? How long will this voyage last? ceremoniously you took your leave. You consciously knew your days were numbered. You gave your edifice a befitting face-lift for your final reunion with your ancestors and your creator alike. You wanted total indulgence to be accorded you to this end but so sadly it was a painful mirage but my singular solace lies in the axiomatic fact that you were granted the rare grace by the superior being to forgive all those who went against your grain and above all my aunt -to wit - Eji appeared whilst you were at the death throes and led you to God before you gave up the ghost.
In the manner of an errant foliage ,airborne in a breezy evening and at the total mercy of a tempest , blend of the funereal and melancholic news of your rather abrupt demise seeped into my memory via my audiological organ.
I reminisce our quality co-existence at your home from birth till death snatched you from me. You not only nurtured, but also carefully and religiously guided and guarded me to my full personality and stature. I am eternally in the red or beholden to you for your maternal love and matronly shreds of advice and admonition my lovely mentor and muse.
Chapter 11: * Lamentations and Open letters*
- explores the antagonists' efforts towards the protagonists to persuade them to honor and uphold the matriarch's dying wishes.
Chapter 1: *Roots of Legacy*
As the sun dipped into the horizon, casting a warm orange glow over the small village of Umuobasi-Isiama Afara-Ukwu in Ibeku nestled in the midst of metropolis of Umuahia. The air was alive with the scent of blooming flowers and the distant hum of cicadas. In a small compound, surrounded by lush greenery, late Adolphus Nwazue Ijebuonwu sat on his porch, his eyes fixed on the fading light.
As the patriarch of the Ijebuonwu's family, he had lived through the ebbs and flows of life, witnessing the beauty and struggles of his community. His wife, Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu, emerged from the kitchenette with a gentle smile on her face, and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Adolphus, dinner is ready. The children are waiting," she said, her voice soft and melodious.
He turned to her, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Thank you, my dear. I will be right there."
As he stood up, his joints creaked slightly, a reminder of his advancing age. He took her hand, and together they walked into the warm glow of the kitchenette. The aroma of freshly cooked yam and vegetable soup filled the air, making his stomach growl with anticipation.
Their children, ranging in age from toddlers to teenagers, chattered excitedly around the dinner table. His eyes sparkled as he surveyed his family. There were Alice, Ejituruonwu, Eberechukwu ,Robinson, Chile the eldest, with his serious demeanor and sharp mind; Nneoma, the gentle soul with a heart full of love; and the younger ones, full of energy and curiosity.
As they sat down to eat, he cleared his throat. "Tonight, I want to share a story with you all," he said, his voice filled with a mix of nostalgia and gravity. "A story about our ancestors, about where we come from, and about the struggles they faced."
The children leaned in, their eyes wide with interest. My granny smiled, knowing that he loved sharing stories of their heritage.
"In the olden days," he began, "our people were known for their bravery and resilience. They faced many challenges, from wars to famines, but they persevered. And through it all, they held on to their traditions and values."
As my grandpa spoke, the room seemed to fade away, and the children were transported to a different time, a time of heroes and legends. They listened with rapt attention, their imaginations running wild.
Robinson, the eldest child of my granny and my father , felt a sense of pride and responsibility washed over him. He knew that one day, he would be the one to carry on the family's legacy at his own mother's kitchen.
The story would continue, but for now, the family sat in comfortable silence, the only sound was the clinking of utensils against plates.
As the night wore on, the family finished their meal and began to disperse. The younger children were excused to play outside, while the older ones helped with the dishes. My grandfather and my granny sat on the porch, watching the stars twinkle to life in the night sky.
My dad, feeling a sense of restlessness, excused himself and walked out into the darkness. He strolled through the village, taking in the sights and sounds of the evening. The air was filled with the scent of wood smoke and the distant sound of drums.
As he walked, he came across a group of young men gathered around a makeshift board, playing a game of ajwa. He watched for a moment, then joined in, his competitive spirit piqued.
Meanwhile, back at the compound, Ejituruonwu sat with her mother, learning the intricacies of traditional weaving. Granny's hands moved deftly, the shuttle flying back and forth as she worked the loom.
"Tell me, Eji," she said, "what do you want to be when you grow up?"
She thought for a moment before answering. "I want to be a great weaver, like you, mother. I love the way the threads come together to create something beautiful."
She smiled, her eyes shining with pride. "You have a good eye for design, Eji, I think you would make a fine weaver."
As the night wore on, the family slowly drifted back to their compound, tired but content. Grandpa and granny sat on their porch, watching their children sleep, feeling grateful for the blessings they had received.
The next morning, the family gathered for breakfast, the atmosphere lively with chatter and laughter. Grandpa smiled, feeling a sense of peace washed over him. This was what life was all about – family, community, and tradition.
Grandpa's eyes, though warm with family, held deep lines, etched by the weight of his past. As a police inspector in the defunct Eastern Region's Government, he had navigated the complex web of politics and justice. But it was his experience in the Nigerian civil war, aka Nigerian -Biafran war that left the most profound scars.
The war had torn families apart, leaving deep wounds that would take generations to heal. He, a soldier fighting for Biafra's independence, had seen the worst of humanity. The memories of fallen comrades, civilian casualties, and the screams of the wounded still haunted him.
After the war, he returned home, his heart heavy with the knowledge that his sacrifices might have been in vain. He resumed his role as a family man, but the pain of the war lingered, a constant reminder of the fragility of life.
As a polygamist, he had multiple wives, each with her own story and struggles. My grandmother, the second wife, played a significant role in the family's dynamics. Her strength and resilience in the face of adversity inspired the other wives and children.
The family's compound became a sanctuary, a place where my grandpa could find solace amidst the chaos of his past. His children grew, each carrying their own piece of his legacy.
But his time was running out. The war had taken its toll on his health, and he knew his days were numbered. He focused on passing down his values, traditions, and stories to his children, hoping they would learn from his experiences.
The year was 1970, and his health began to decline rapidly. The family gathered around him, sensing the end was near. He communicated and instructed his eldest daughter Alice where he wished his remains to be laid to rest after he joined his ancestors. His dying wish was upheld irrespective of the fact that his daughter was a woman among his male children. Igbo tradition or culture never frowned at this decision.
*Abandoned Legacy*
Before the war, he settled in Port Harcourt, where he built a meaningful life and amassed a considerable fortune. He invested in properties, businesses, and traded goods, becoming a respected figure in the community.
However, the Federal Military Government, under the leadership of Colonel Olusegun Obasanjo and General Murtala Muhammed, but more prominently associated with General Yakubu Gowon during the civil war era, introduced the Abandoned Property Policy. This policy allowed the government to seize properties deemed abandoned, often targeting properties owned by Igbo people who had fled during the war.
He, having fought on the side of Biafra, found himself vulnerable to this policy. Despite his efforts to rebuild his life, the government seized his properties, businesses, and assets, leaving him with little more than the clothes on his back and 20 pounds to resuscitate his life.
The family struggled to make ends meet, but his spirit remained unbroken. He continued to share his stories, traditions, and values with his children, ensuring they knew their heritage.
As his health declined with chronic hiccups like my dad's, the family gathered around him, cherishing the time they had left. His passing in 1970 left a void, but his legacy lived on through his children and grandchildren.
He ruled his family with iron fist. He maltreated my granny whom He married at the tender age of 13 years from Umuhute Ndume Ibeku in Umuahia North LGA as a result of her religious persuasion. Her marriage to him hit the rock and she was sent out with only a piece of wrap to her maiden home. She actually took care of her step children [late De Chile and Da Alice] whose mother demised as a result of domestic voilence from their father.
*A Legacy of Resilience*
In the heart of Ndume Ibeku, is Umuhute a village nestled in the rolling hills and lush vale of Abia State, Nigeria, a remarkable woman named Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu [Williams Ezocha nee] lived a life marked by trials and triumphs. Born into a family that would eventually turn its back on her, she rose above adversity, determined to build a better life for herself and her children.
My grandmother, a damsel from Umuhute Ndume Ibeku was married to my grandpa and moved into his household. She took on the responsibility of caring for her stepchildren, De Chile Ijebuonwu of the blessed memory and Da Alice Ukauwa who had lost their mother to domestic violence.
As she navigated her new role, she faced challenges in her marriage due to her religious persuasion. Despite these difficulties, she devoted herself to her stepchildren and her own offspring , providing them with love and care. She got divorced and was sent away with only a piece of wrapper, faced immense challenges as a lactating mother. Despite the hardships, she relied on her skills as a seamstress and her entrepreneurial spirit to care for her children.
Her ardent faith played a significant role in her life, and she often sought God's intervention, especially when she was struggling to conceive again. The birth of Uncle Orisa, which she attributed to God's intervention, brought her immense joy.
As a young woman, she faced unimaginable challenges, from being divorced, disinherited to being abandoned by her husband. Yet, she persevered, relying on her strength and resourcefulness to provide for her children. Her determination and love for her family drove her to work tirelessly, but diligently and she eventually found employment at Queen Elizabeth Hospital [now Federal Medical Center] in Umuahia.
Despite the odds against her, she excelled in her roles, first as an orderly, then as a seamstress in the matron's office, and even as a cook in the hospital's kitchen. Her versatility and work ethics earned her the respect and admiration of her colleagues and superiors. She established meaningful connections with her colleagues like Christie, Ezediokpo, Ada, Nnadi and host of others.
While she remained at the hospital, Udoji bonus was paid to workers. Some of her colleagues expended that windfall on frivolities but she realized her accommodation's problem and secured herself a second plot of land at Etitinabu Isiama Afara-Ukwu adjacent to powerhouse off- Factory Road. Her first tract of land was bought at Umuokeyi Ndume Ahia Eke. She later alienated the first property. As she remained at the hospital she enjoyed the privilege of shrouding the corpse of the first military head of state of Nigeria, General Thomas Umunnakwe Aguiyi Ironsi at the hospital's morgue. This was a rare privilege for a rejected wife who happened to be native of the same village with the murdered head of state from Ndume Ibeku.
Despite my grandpa's attempts to influence her dismissal from her employer, the British colonial and expatriate head of the hospital favored her and allowed her to keep her job. This decision likely brought her a sense of relief and stability, enabling her to continue providing for her children.The fact that she was a single mother seemed to have worked in her favor, with the hospital's leadership showing compassion and understanding. This experience might have strengthened her resolve and confidence in her abilities.
As a single mother, she worked tirelessly to provide for her children: Chiabuotu, Baby of blessed memory, Ejituruonwu, Eberechukwu, and Chizuorum. Her determination and faith helped her navigate the difficulties she faced.
Disinherited by her husband,she found solace in her own strength and resourcefulness. With unwavering dedication, she trained her children, sending them to school, and supporting their dreams. Ebere,one of her children, would go on to attend the prestigious Queen Elisabeth Nursing School in Umuahia, now the Federal Medical Center.
Despite my grandpa's attempts to influence her dismissal from her employer, the British colonial and expatriate head of the hospital favored her and allowed her to keep her job. This decision likely brought her a sense of relief and stability, enabling her to continue providing for her children.The fact that she was a single mother seemed to have worked in her favor, with the hospital's leadership showing compassion and understanding. This experience might have strengthened her resolve and confidence in her abilities.
As a single mother, she worked tirelessly to provide for her children: Chiabuotu, Baby of blessed memory, Ejituruonwu, Eberechukwu, and Chizuorum. Her determination and faith helped her navigate the difficulties she faced.
Disinherited by her husband,she found solace in her own strength and resourcefulness. With unwavering dedication, she trained her children, sending them to school, and supporting their dreams. Ebere,one of her children, would go on to attend the prestigious Queen Elisabeth Nursing School in Umuahia, now the Federal Medical Center.
My father, was guided by her through various vocational schools, and with the help of late mr. Alex Onwuzuruigbo, he secured a job at Golden Guinea Breweries LTD. Another son of hers, Orisa aka Chizuorum, was supported in his academic pursuits, even receiving assistance while studying at Lincoln University in the United States.
She got superannuated in 1992 with gratiuity of only 20 thousand Naira. Her pensions from both federal and state governments were meagre. Her retirement marked a new chapter in her life. Despite receiving a modest pension and gratuity, she remained active and focused on building a better life for herself and her family. She invested in her plot of land, developing it into a home where she lived until her passing. This accomplishment showcased her determination and resourcefulness, even in retirement.
She remained energetic and motivated, continuing to build a legacy for her family.
Her story serves as an inspiration, highlighting the importance of resilience, hard work, and determination.
The matriarch's own journey took her to the United States, where she lived and worked for nearly a decade, earning her naturalization and a pension. Her life became a testament to resilience and determination.
However, as her children grew and prospered, tensions arose over her wealth and pension. Allegations of restriction and control would test the bonds of family and legacy, leaving a complex web of emotions and conflict in its wake.
*Chapter 2: *The Family's Rise*
As the matriarch's career flourished, her children began to reap the benefits of her hard work and determination. She sent Auntie Eberechukwu to the prestigious Queen Elizabeth Nursing School in Umuahia, where she trained to become a nurse. She guided, directed and guarded my dad through various vocational schools, and with the assistance of mr. Alex Onwuzuruigbo of blessed memory she secured a job for him at Golden Guinea Breweries LTD.
Uncle Orisa, another son of hers was supported in his academic pursuits, and his mother's sacrifices paid off when he earned a spot at Lincoln University in the United States. The matriarch's own journey took her to the US, where she lived and worked for nearly a decade, earning her naturalization and a pension.
Through her children's successes, the matriarch's legacy began to take shape. She had built a better life for herself and her family, despite the challenges she faced. Her determination and resilience had paid off, and her children were thriving.
As the family prospered, they began to make a name for themselves in their community. The matriarch's children became respected members of society, and their mother's sacrifices were not forgotten.
But as the family's wealth and influence grew, so did the tensions and conflicts that would eventually tear them apart.
*Chapter 3: *Tensions Rise*
The matriarch's children grew older and more successful, tensions began to rise within the family. Ebere and Orisa, who had benefited greatly from their mother's support, seemed to have a different vision for her finances. They allegedly restricted her access to her own money, limiting her ability to assist other family members.
My father, who had been guided by his mother's determination and resourcefulness, watched the unfolding drama with a mix of sadness and concern. He knew his mother's strength and resilience, but he also understood the complexities of family dynamics.
My uncle's wife, Victoria Orisa Carl Ijebuonwu was a side chick who cast a dark shadow in his previous marriage to Blessing Ijeoma Chibo Ijebuonwu. She had a liaison with him while he was still legally married to Blessing. Blessing fought frantically to save her marriage by matchmaking her husband's paramour but all to no avail. She eventually catalyzed the crash of her marriage and wove her way into the family via her infamous nuptials with my uncle.
After my uncle's ultra-modern house was completed, he invited the matriarch to live with him, promising her a better life. However, she was hesitant and unsure about leaving her home. Most family members supported her decision to decline the offer, but he insisted that she would love the new place.
When I visited home, he asked me to persuade her to reconsider. I spoke with her, and she agreed to move in only if he would promise not to mistreat her. She demanded a written undertaking to ensure her well-being. I relayed her conditions to him , and he assured me he would be kind and gentle.
Despite his promises, the matriarch's fears were confirmed after she moved in and domiciled at the so- called magnificent ,magnanimous, ventilated and fortified edifice of their domicile. She suffered maltreatment and felt trapped in her own son's home. In her words, "I was held a prisoner in my son's home."
What was more, he had ulterior motives. Behind her back, he planned to demolish her current home and build a new structure for commercial purposes, disregarding her wishes for him to inherit the property after her passing. This revelation exposed his true intentions and left the matriarch feeling betrayed.
Her maltreatment by her daughter-in-law necessited her exit from the property with the assistance of my dad but not without her uninfluenced decision, instruction and approval. Ejituru my aunt and her last daughter Chinyere with her broods who came to spend time with their great-grandmother were embrassingly ejected out of their property in the cover of darkness after a copious tirade from them which left the matriarch hysterically and inconsolably tearful till her death.
The sequence of these events impacted my granny's life negatively. Abruptly it became very palpable with the trajectory of events that there was no love lost among Lady Eberechukwu, her elder brother, and elder sister, and she had worked synergically with Chief Orisa to disregard my granny's dying will and last wish, especially where she had wished to be laid in state and interred.
The matriarch, however, remained strong and determined, refusing to let her children's disagreements define her. She continued to live life on her own terms.
*Chapter 4: *The Matriarch's Final Days*
As the matriarch's health began to decline, the family dynamics became increasingly strained. Ebere and Orisa's control over her finances became more pronounced, causing tension among the other family members.
Despite her advanced age and the challenges she faced, the matriarch remained a pillar of strength, drawing on the lessons she had learned throughout her life. She had lived a life marked by resilience and determination, and she would not let her final days be defined by the family's conflicts.
On November 19th,2024, the matriarch passed away, with her eldest son [ Chiabuotu]following suit four days later on November 23rd, 2024 leaving behind a legacy of love, resilience, and complexity. Her pension and life insurance policy, which had been a point of contention among her children, would now become a central issue in the family's struggle to come to terms with, with her passing.
*Chapter 5: *Legacy and Conflict*
The matriarch's passing marked the beginning of a new chapter in the family's history. The conflict over her pension and life insurance policy intensified, with Auntie Ebere and Uncle Orisa at the center of the dispute.
Many other family members felt excluded from the decision-making process, and tensions rose as they struggled to come to terms with the matriarch's legacy. The family's relationships and dynamics would never be the same, as they navigated the complex web of emotions and conflicts that had been building for years.
As the family struggled to find a way forward, they could not help but reflect on the matriarch's life and legacy. She had been a woman of remarkable strength and resilience, and her passing left a void that could never be filled.
The story of the matriarch and her family serves as a testament to the power of love, determination, and resilience. Despite the challenges they faced, they had built a life that would be remembered for generations to come.
*Chapter 6:* A Life Unraveled*
The matriarch's life was marked by both triumph and tragedy. Her marriage to her husband had been a significant chapter in her life, but it ultimately ended in divorce. Many suitors had sought her hand in marriage after the divorce, but her father's consultation with my father led to her decision to remain unmarried.
Her husband's family had played a significant role in her life, but the marriage had not worked out. Despite this, she had dedicated herself to raising her children and building a better life for them.
The matriarch's strength and resilience had been tested time and again, but she had always emerged stronger. Her determination to educate her children had been unwavering, and she had sacrificed much to ensure they had a brighter future.
As the family navigated the complexities of her legacy, they could not help but reflect on the matriarch's life and the choices she had made. Her story was one of love, loss, and triumph, and it would continue to inspire and shape their lives for generations to come.
The matriarch's journey had not been easy, but it had been hers, and she had lived it with courage and determination. Her legacy would live on, a testament to the power of a mother's love and the strength of the human spirit.
*Chapter 7: *A Bitter End*
The matriarch's passing was met with a mixture of grief and controversy. As the family prepared for her burial, it became clear that her final wishes would not be honored. Despite her explicit desire to be laid in state in her own living room and buried at her own compound but , Orisa and Ebere had other plans.
In a shocking move, Orisa buried their mother at his own compound, subverting her dying wishes. The decision sparked outrage and hurt among other family members, who felt that the matriarch's autonomy and dignity had been disregarded.
The burial was a contentious affair, with some family members accusing Orisa and Ebere of disrespecting their mother's wishes. The tension and conflict that had been building for years had finally boiled over, and the family was left to grapple with the consequences of their actions.
As the matriarch's body was laid to rest, the family could not help but wonder what she would have thought about the controversy surrounding her burial. Would she have been surprised by the depth of the family's divisions, or would she have expected it?
The matriarch's legacy, once marked by strength and resilience, was now tainted by the bitter end. The family's dynamics had been exposed, and the wounds would take a long time to heal. The question on everyone's mind was: what would happen next? Would the family be able to move forward, or would the matriarch's burial be a turning point in their downward spiral?
*Chapter 8: *A Legacy of Pain and
Disinheritance*
The matriarch's decision to disinherit Orisa was a culmination of years of pain and disappointment. The mismanagement of her money in their joint account with Union Bank Umuahia had been the final straw which had the camel's back shattered to smithereens.The betrayal of trust had left a deep wound, and she had chosen to sever ties with her son.
In a surprising move, the matriarch had left a will bequeathing her house to her first daughter, Ejituruonwu, and her granddaughters, Adaeze and Nneka, who are Orisa's daughters. The will came with an oral caveat that all her grandchildren and great-grandchildren should be accorded access to the property, effectively creating a life estate.
The matriarch's intention was succinctly clear: the property was to be a family's legacy, a symbol of her love and connection to her descendants. She had specifically stipulated that the property should never be sold, ensuring that it would remain in the family for generations to come.
The will sparked a mix of emotions among the family members. Some were relieved that the matriarch's wishes would be honored, while others were bitter about the disinheritance of Orisa. The question on everyone's mind was: would the family be able to respect the matriarch's wishes, or would the legacy of pain and disinheritance continue to tear them apart?
*Chapter 9: *Betrayal of Trust*
The matriarch's final wish, as stated in her will, was for her American money to be shared among Eberechukwu, Chiabuotu, Alice, and Ejituruonwu. However, it seemed that this wish would not be honored. Orisa and Eberechukwu, who were the managers of her fund, had other plans.
The family was shocked and outraged when they discovered that Orisa and Eberechukwu had ignored the matriarch's wishes. The betrayal of trust was palpable, and the family was left to wonder if anyone would be held accountable for their actions.
As the news spread, tensions rose, and conflicts escalated. The family was torn apart by accusations and recriminations, and it seemed that the matriarch's legacy was being torn apart by the very people she had trusted.
The question on everyone's mind was: would justice be served, or would the matriarch's wishes continue to be ignored? Would the family be able to come together and find a way to honor her legacy, or would the betrayal of trust tear them apart forever?
As the family navigated the complexities of the matriarch's legacy, old wounds began to resurface. The tension among Orisa, Eberechukwu and the other family members grew, fueled by the disputed will and the mismanagement of the matriarch's funds.
A deeper betrayal unfolded as Ikechukwu Christian Chiabuotu, the self-acclaimed principal grandchild, mismanaged the matriarch's funds in my joint account with them at United Bank for Africa Umuahia. This breach of trust devastated her, leaving her heartbroken and hysterically tearful. The pain was eerily reminiscent of her experience with Orisa, which had driven her to confide in her grandchildren seeking solace and safety. Unfortunately, her hopes were dashed once again.
After her passing, Ikechukwu's actions revealed a shocking hypocrisy. Despite being one of a major beneficiaries of her legacy, he disregarded her explicit wish to be laid in state and buried at her compound by her grandchildren. Instead, he cited culture and tradition as reasons to support Orisa and Eberechukwu's decision to defy her wishes.
However, his true intentions were far from noble. His actions were motivated by selfish interests, specifically to prevent Orisa from contesting the Ijebuonwu's property at Avo, where he resides. This move directly contradicted the matriarch's clear instructions before her death: "That tract of land shall be shared between Orisa and Chiabuotu."
Ikechukwu's betrayal exposed a painful truth: his loyalty was to his own selfish interests, not to the matriarch's wishes or legacy.
*Kinsmen's Betrayal*
The matriarch's final wishes were brazenly disregarded by her own kinsmen and mine who cited cultural traditions to justify their actions. Despite her clear instructions, they showed blatant favoritism towards Orisa, ignoring her desires.
In the midst of this betrayal, my aunt, Ejiutruonwu made frantic efforts to uphold the matriarch's wishes, but her attempts were met with disappointment and resistance. The family's actions left a deep wound, revealing a painful truth about where loyalty and priorities truly lay.
The aftermath of this betrayal continues to resonate, leaving questions about the true meaning of family's loyalty and the importance of honoring one's legacy.
Even some family members who had little or no knowledge of the bone of contention were involved by the party which believed its interests were at stake, but at the expense of the truth. Worse still, those who were aware of the fact of the matter either chose not to speak out or were intimidated to conceal the truth.
The efforts of Umuada[ ie married daughters of the community] towards ensuring that the matriarch's wishes would be honored were met with stiff resistance.
Meanwhile, as we grapple with the loss of our beloved grandmother. We remember her strength, her love, and her unwavering dedication to the family. We recall the stories she told, the lessons she taught, and the laughter we shared. All those who offended and disdained her were genuinely forgiven and blessed by her. What a remarkable and wonderful matriarch she was!
As the family struggles to come to terms with its grief and the conflict that had arisen, we begin to realize that our grandmother's legacy was more than just a collection of assets and properties. It is a legacy of love, resilience, and determination.
*Chapter 10: *Tributes*
ELEGY
**THE TRANSITION OF A RARE MATRIARCH CUM GEM**
As my funereal ink fluxes with heavy heart laced with magnanimity of lamentations and lachrymosity of despondency, it reminds us a la William Shakespeare "death, a necessary end, will come when it will come."
Death! You, enemy of all foes! Recumbent at every door post like a camel and with your clammy and somewhat frigid phalanges in the manner of wheels of juggernauts you clamped life out of my beloved granny on the 19th of November 2024. "Death, you are merciless and as such no respecter of persons.
What more exploits can you enact but impair the flesh? Where,oh death,is thy sting? Where then lies thy
sting? You mingled my joy with melancholia. You are but a transition. The Lord Jesus Christ has eternally broken your wings. Death, death awaits you! Death ! Death awaits you!
Afaraukwu and its fullness where were you? Could you not have stopped this abominable and heart shredding bereavement? Were you at market square, junketing or jollifying in a faraway place?
Granny, you faded away like the stars of the morning.
Lost your light in the glorious sun.
Thus you passed from this earth and its toiling.
Only remembered by what you have done.
Only remembered, only remembered,
You shall be missed, though by others succeeded, reaping the fields you in springtime have sown? Yes, but the sowers must pass from their labors.
Ever remembered by what they have done
Only the truth that in life you have spoken
Only the seed that on earth you have sown; these shall pass onwards when you are forgotten. Oh, when the Savior shall make up His jewels,when the bright crowns rejoicing are won,then shall His weary and faithful disciples all be remembered by what they have done.
Afaraukwu and its fullness where were you? Could you not have stopped this abominable and heart shredding bereavement? Were you at market square, junketing or jollifying in a faraway place?
Granny, you faded away like the stars of the morning.
Lost your light in the glorious sun.
Thus you passed from this earth and its toiling.
Only remembered by what you have done.
Only remembered, only remembered,
You shall be missed, though by others succeeded, reaping the fields you in springtime have sown? Yes, but the sowers must pass from their labors.
Ever remembered by what they have done
Only the truth that in life you have spoken
Only the seed that on earth you have sown; these shall pass onwards when you are forgotten. Oh, when the Savior shall make up His jewels,when the bright crowns rejoicing are won,then shall His weary and faithful disciples all be remembered by what they have done.
Granny, I address you apostrophically though posthumously. Where art thou? Where art thou? Have your avatar embarked on peregrination to the demimonde with your residue left adrift? How long will this voyage last? ceremoniously you took your leave. You consciously knew your days were numbered. You gave your edifice a befitting face-lift for your final reunion with your ancestors and your creator alike. You wanted total indulgence to be accorded you to this end but so sadly it was a painful mirage but my singular solace lies in the axiomatic fact that you were granted the rare grace by the superior being to forgive all those who went against your grain and above all my aunt -to wit - Eji appeared whilst you were at the death throes and led you to God before you gave up the ghost.
In the manner of an errant foliage ,airborne in a breezy evening and at the total mercy of a tempest , blend of the funereal and melancholic news of your rather abrupt demise seeped into my memory via my audiological organ.
The mournful tidings left me with a somewhat rude tremor so much so that I got submerged in catatonia. It appeared this took place in a reverie. In fact, I was under the impression this could have been a faux , but that phantasmagoria was rather ephemeral.
If weeping you an ocean will revert your trajectory from the great beyond to the land of living, rest assured we are legion to perform it.
"MAMA NKE UKWU as you were fondly styled, it might be crystal-clearly couched you drunk life to its very lees,smelt the roses ,and eventually pushed up the daisies. But the ever presence of hoary hairs are decorative embroidery, if not an ornament or diamond in the intricate fabric of every family. Granny you were one. If you were not, who then was?"
If weeping you an ocean will revert your trajectory from the great beyond to the land of living, rest assured we are legion to perform it.
"MAMA NKE UKWU as you were fondly styled, it might be crystal-clearly couched you drunk life to its very lees,smelt the roses ,and eventually pushed up the daisies. But the ever presence of hoary hairs are decorative embroidery, if not an ornament or diamond in the intricate fabric of every family. Granny you were one. If you were not, who then was?"
You meandered the labyrinth of life, leaving in your wake indelible foot impressions in the sand of time. As your sun dipped over the horizon of death like a candle in oxygen, you marked the end of your generation.
Granny, as a colossus you astride the whole gamut of the facets of life. You were larger- than- life. Rather Phenomenal and alpha female. You, holding the bull by the horns shattered records to smithereens. Concurrently you broke all barriers and rose ex nihilo from your ashes in the manner of the mythological and proverbial Phoenix to stardom and maintained your matriarchy onto sepulcher.
You were not only an industrialist par-excellence but also the following;
a seamstress of the highest order, a seasoned farmer, an astute economist, an encyclopedic historian, a puritanical religious reformer and as a prodigy you acquired education as a result of a privilege accorded you as you escorted your only brother to school during the era female education was not valued .
A very resourceful mother, wife, aunt and grandmother who showered her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren and other plethora of relatives with unconditional love and care.
In conflict and crisis resolution you demonstrated your indefatigable finesse. You never yielded to intimidation.
Granny, as a colossus you astride the whole gamut of the facets of life. You were larger- than- life. Rather Phenomenal and alpha female. You, holding the bull by the horns shattered records to smithereens. Concurrently you broke all barriers and rose ex nihilo from your ashes in the manner of the mythological and proverbial Phoenix to stardom and maintained your matriarchy onto sepulcher.
You were not only an industrialist par-excellence but also the following;
a seamstress of the highest order, a seasoned farmer, an astute economist, an encyclopedic historian, a puritanical religious reformer and as a prodigy you acquired education as a result of a privilege accorded you as you escorted your only brother to school during the era female education was not valued .
A very resourceful mother, wife, aunt and grandmother who showered her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren and other plethora of relatives with unconditional love and care.
In conflict and crisis resolution you demonstrated your indefatigable finesse. You never yielded to intimidation.
I reminisce our quality co-existence at your home from birth till death snatched you from me. You not only nurtured, but also carefully and religiously guided and guarded me to my full personality and stature. I am eternally in the red or beholden to you for your maternal love and matronly shreds of advice and admonition my lovely mentor and muse.
You filled in that maternal gulf in my being and enacted its attendant functions not only with assiduity and aplomb but also nailed them down to fine art. Suffice it to say that your feats were innumerable so much so that they beggared description. From rags you went to riches.
The family finally came together, united in their grief and their determination to honor their matriarch's legacy. They worked through their differences, and slowly, healing began. The house, once a symbol of discord, became a place of warmth and connection, where stories of the past were shared and memories were created.
As we looked back on the journey, remembering the pain and the struggle, but also the love and the resilience. We knew that our grandmother's legacy lived on, not just in the physical sense, but in the lessons she taught, the love she shared, and the family she nurtured.
As we closed the chapter on one era, we began a new one, filled with hope, forgiveness, and a deeper understanding of the complexities of family. The matriarch's spirit continued to guide us, reminding us of the importance of love, unity, and the enduring power of family's bonds.
The story may be ending, but the legacy lives on, a testament to the transformative power of love and forgiveness.
*** OUTER BACK COVER ***
"A powerful and poignant novelette about the complexities of family, love, and legacy. When a beloved matriarch passes away, her family is left to navigate the aftermath of her passing, confronting secrets, lies, and long-held resentments. As they struggle to come to terms with their loss and honor her legacy, they must also confront their own flaws and fears.
Through the eyes of a devoted grandchild, this novelette explores the intricate web of family dynamics, the weight of legacy, and the enduring power of love. A story of resilience, forgiveness, and the unbreakable bonds that tie us together."
Your contagious smile not only lit up the gloomy day but also purveyed it with warmth. Your gentle and cosy touch soothed corporeal pangs. What about your gentle words which had not only soporific but also therapeutic effects. As that enchanting beauty of yours metamorphoses to fossil, its residue will I gather and cherish infinitely.
As your remains are hearse- driven with plaintive knell to their final place of repose, friends and fiends alike taking in this final departure to the great beyond, it depicts the brevity of life on this sinful earth. We all are pilgrims on this earth. All life struggles are vanity upon vanity .
This lachrymose day calls for sober reflections and introspections with a bid to making peace with God. In Him is eternal life and rest.
May the Almight God accord you perfect repose in his bosom and us the fortitude to bear this irreparable loss with its concomitant lacuna.
Death has mingled my laughter with gall, wormwood and Sorrow! Who will call me uzo again and pray for me? Our close-knit my lovely wife in disguise drew flak across the board. No wonder the gray hairs of the land referred to me as Nwazue your deceased hubby. I am he reincarnated as was acknowledged by them and confirmed by you.
Adieu, beloved mother, grandmother, virtuous wife and invaluable mentor. The lacuna hewn by your exeunt will eternally remain empty for you did etch indelible impression on our seat of emotions. You will be sung endlessly my heroine. The last ligature of our ménage.
Prince Clinton Uzodimma Ijebuonwu [ Special
grandson]
__________________________________________
** TRIBUTE TO MY BELOVED MOTHER **
Mama, your death is still a mystery to me. However, thinking back on the events before your demise, I am happy and fulfilled even though I miss you dearly. I am grateful to God because I met you before you passed on, and I preached the gospel to you, and you received it wholeheartedly.
I left PortHarcourt a few days before your demise, pleading with God to meet you alive, and God granted me my request. I have no reason to feel worried, threatened, or sad because I am confident that you are with the Lord.
"Death is life's reality, and all we seek is to live and die in right standing with God. It is not about how long you lived but how well".
You were a very loving, kind-hearted, caring, virtuous, and hardworking woman. You never stopped working hard even until your final moments.You were a mother to all. You did not restrict your hand of fellowship to your family. The testimonies of your goodness, care, kindness, and love have been flowing in since your demise, and I cannot help but marvel at the impact you made on the lives of a lot of people.
You were also a seer. Your wealth of wisdom, knowledge, understanding and insight always left me wondering how you could see into the future and make things right in the present. It was a rare gift that you used to address issues and manage the affairs of your home. You were the PILLAR that held our family together. Oh! What a loss!
You have set a standard for us, your children, and by the grace of God, we will work hard to live out this legacy.
I am thankful to God, and I am fulfilled because I am sure you are with the Lord.
Do I miss you? Mama, I miss you very much. The children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren children, friends, and well wishers you left behind all miss you.
We will continue to keep the light burning as we reflect on this life well lived.
Oh! Urunwanyi,
Woman of substance, keep resting in the bosom of the Lord till we meet to part no more.
Mama's first daughter,
Mrs. Elizabeth Onyeneho
___________________________________________
***DIRGE FOR A FALLEN DOYEN***
Death you are a camel recumbent on every doorstep. You are in the words of Julius Caeser as couched by William Shakespeare thus: "death, a necessary end, will come when it will come."
Death how many orphans and floodgate of lachrymosity have you left and unlidded respectively wherever you tread?
Death, with your frigid claws and rather clammy phlanages you clamped that breath of life out of my paterfamilias on the 23rd of November 2024 just four days in the wake of his beloved and benevolent mom's demise. What more exploit can you wrought, but destory the flesh? " Where, oh death, is thy sting ? Where then lies they sting? You laced my gaiety with blues. You are just a transition. The Lord Jesus Christ has eternally broken your wings. Oh death! death awaits you. Death! Death awaits you!
Mr. 'B', Bolly West, as you were fondly styled, the news of your expiration engulfed me with a profound but rather rude quiver. You were hale and hearty as I spent three months with you in the course of my last visit. Three days prior to my departure, you complained about chronic hiccups. You got adequate medical attention and you swiftly responded to the administered medications. Out of the blue, your health status segued from good to bad and finally to worse. At every stage of this ill-health, you were accorded the best available treatment Umuahia could offer. The wherewithal was no object, but the situation that might have necessitated the deterioration of your health and mama's was the object. So, it poisoned the sight but let it be hidden.
You should not have caved in to death as a result of this recent ill-health. You had survived the worst in your lifetime. In spite of your indefatigability to weather this storm, your light petered out like a candle in the wind.The blissful moments and pleasantries we traded in the course of my sojourn etched indelible memories in my seat of emotions.
You were a man of principle. Renowned for your vocality and your integrity. Owner of words you were. You commanded english language in the manner of a literary guru: Chinua Achebe.
Your anglo-saxon lilt would be painfully missed.
Your paucity of attachment to materialism accorded you that sui generis distinction amongst your contemporaries. Your material estate was not unbeknownst to you and as such you possessed its concomitant precepts. You were not an avaricious fellow and never begrudged any.
Your fraternal affection and reticence were mistaken by some as asininity. But these were your very essence and grain.
Your sense of cuisine was second to none. Chef par excellence. Your sartorial sensibility was superb. Putting this another way, you were immaculately and impeccably clad if not fastidiously. Your salesmanship found its expression in your mastery of puffery.
Over time you saw the necessity to make amends on your inadequacies. Though that might have been perceived by some as a token, if not a cold comfort, but at least you did make an effort.
As your cadaver is hearse-driven with plaintive knell to its final place of repose, friends and fiends alike taking in this final departure to the great beyond, it depicts the brevity of life on this sinful earth. We all are pilgrims on this earth. All life struggles are vanity upon vanity.
This lachrymose day calls for sober reflections and introspections with a bid to making peace with God. In Him is eternal life and rest.
May the Almight God accord you perfect repose in His bosom and us the fortitude to bear this irreparable loss with its concomitant lacuna. You would be eternally missed.
Adieu, mr. 'B'! Adieu, Bolly West!
Late mr. Robinson Chiabuto Ijebuonwu, aka sir Bolingo whose life voyage or pilgrimage via earth's labyrinth abruptly struck the culd-de-sac on the gloomy sunset of 23rd November 2024, was the eldest scion of five progenies of late mr. Adolphus Nwazue Ijebuonwu and late madam Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu. He got sired on the eleventh day of May, in the year nineteen hundred and forty six.
As a lad, he got enrolled in primary school under the auspices of the defunct Eastern Region's Government. He successfully accomplished his standard six program and subsequently bagged the attendant certificate. As a philospher, his voracious quest and penchant for erudition remained unslaked. His autodidactic approach to epistemology and axiology propelled him to enroll via correspondence to the London school of salesmanship. At the completion of his academic program, a diploma in salesmanship was consequently conferred on him. Thereafter he strove to carve a niche for himself in this sphere but his attempts to materially regurgitate himself were short-lived.
His culinary propensity unlidded a new vista in the domain of hoteldom. With reckless abandon, he not only made inroads but broke limits into the distaff. He axiomatically was Chef par excellence. From Obigbo to Bauchi back to Umuahia [Golden Guinea breweries] he slaked the pallates of legion. He hung his shingle in this regard.
When Golden Gineau breweries went to hell in handbasket , he resiliently went into sales of nonalcoholic beverages-cum- pool enterprise.
As was deemed fit and also as the functional perequisite of the society for the sustenance of life, he walked down the aisle.This nuptials brought forth seven offspring. Four sons and three daughters. But he is unfortunately survived by his four sons, one daughter, his spouse and host of other relatives.
Endowed with the gift of gab, he was dubbed owner of words and this was in no way a misnomer. The fluidity of words gushing out of his buccal cavity earned him the appellation: BOLLY WEST.
His anglo-saxon cadence is immortality.
In conclusion, he had a very close affinity with his creator. His piety was unambiguously expressed when he became the pastor of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Until his death he had fellowshipped and worshipped with Salvation Ministry Umuahia.
Prince Clinton Uzodimma Ijebuonwu [ son]
------------------------------------------------
*Tribute to My Beloved Elder Brother*
Dede, I was so pained and broken. The news of your death came as a rude shock to me. Our mother had just passed a few days before right in my presence and while I was still trying to process what had happened, I got the news of your death. How would I process the thought of losing my mother and my loving brother in less than a week? My heart was completely shattered. This was the hardest and most difficult phase of my life but I trust God to help me pull through.
I could not believe that what started as a mere hiccup metamorphosed into your untimely demise despite all medical efforts to abate it.
Dede, my only consolation was that I spoke to you about Jesus few days before your passing and you accepted Him wholeheartedly so I was confident that you were at peace with your maker.
You were a man of peace, a man who always stood by the truth no matter whose ox was gored. You were so caring and loving. Life will never be the same without you.
I will miss you so much Dede m.
Laa n’udo
Your Sister,
Ejituru Elizabeth Onyeneho (Née Ijebuonwu)
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**TRIBUTE TO MY BELOVED MOTHER**
Death, we all know who you are. A respecter of no persons. A necessary end that comes when it will come. In the manner of juggernauts, you crush your victims to pulp. You come through various agents: sickness, accidents, physical and spiritual attacks and manipulations."
You neither sow nor plant, but always reap where you did not labor. You roar and prowl like ravenous wolves and lions seeking your countless preys.
On a daily basis, you bring torrents of tears trickling down the cheeks of mourners for the loss of their loved ones. You disguise as a friend, but you are the enemy of all.
Your cold grasp squeezed life out of my beloved grandmother, father, and mother in close successions. Last year was a year of unimaginable loss for me. The pains still linger, compounded now by this new sorrow. The recent incident- the death of my beloved mother, on August 1st, 2025- has left me shattered.
"Maggie, the sad news of your passing sent cold shivers down my spine. It has barely been a year since my beloved grandmother and amiable father passed away, and now death has dealt another devastating blow. It is hard to wrap my head around this loss."
I am submerged under the ocean of melancholia. All words of encouragement and condolences to console me yielded no effects; I am so sorrow-stricken, that I refused to be consoled. Sackcloth is my attire.
Death, I have a question for you: What more can you do, but murder the flesh?
Can you kill my spirit and soul?
Death, this is your last fight; death itself awaits you. Your rightful place is bottomless pit.
Though you lived your life on your own terms, and that is a testament to your strength, death ultimately took its course.
You drank life to the lees.
You are a paragon of beauty, earning you the appellation "Beatrice" or "beauty" from your husband. Your parents christened you Magdalene, while your mother-in-law named you Chinyere, a theophoric moniker- meaning given by God.
I spared no expense to care for and treat you when you were out of sorts. But money, they say, can neither save nor buy life. You last memories will continue to resonate and reverberate among us. You will be deeply missed by your loved ones who survived you. I will especially miss our moments together; I will never forget when you called me "brother Pee". You are forever etched in our memory.
Your parting blessings and memories will be a treasure to me till the end of time.
Rest in perfect peace mom.
[Prince Clinton Uzodimma Ijebuonwu-Son]
Death, we all know who you are. A respecter of no persons. A necessary end that comes when it will come. In the manner of juggernauts, you crush your victims to pulp. You come through various agents: sickness, accidents, physical and spiritual attacks and manipulations."
You neither sow nor plant, but always reap where you did not labor. You roar and prowl like ravenous wolves and lions seeking your countless preys.
On a daily basis, you bring torrents of tears trickling down the cheeks of mourners for the loss of their loved ones. You disguise as a friend, but you are the enemy of all.
Your cold grasp squeezed life out of my beloved grandmother, father, and mother in close successions. Last year was a year of unimaginable loss for me. The pains still linger, compounded now by this new sorrow. The recent incident- the death of my beloved mother, on August 1st, 2025- has left me shattered.
"Maggie, the sad news of your passing sent cold shivers down my spine. It has barely been a year since my beloved grandmother and amiable father passed away, and now death has dealt another devastating blow. It is hard to wrap my head around this loss."
I am submerged under the ocean of melancholia. All words of encouragement and condolences to console me yielded no effects; I am so sorrow-stricken, that I refused to be consoled. Sackcloth is my attire.
Death, I have a question for you: What more can you do, but murder the flesh?
Can you kill my spirit and soul?
Death, this is your last fight; death itself awaits you. Your rightful place is bottomless pit.
Though you lived your life on your own terms, and that is a testament to your strength, death ultimately took its course.
You drank life to the lees.
You are a paragon of beauty, earning you the appellation "Beatrice" or "beauty" from your husband. Your parents christened you Magdalene, while your mother-in-law named you Chinyere, a theophoric moniker- meaning given by God.
I spared no expense to care for and treat you when you were out of sorts. But money, they say, can neither save nor buy life. You last memories will continue to resonate and reverberate among us. You will be deeply missed by your loved ones who survived you. I will especially miss our moments together; I will never forget when you called me "brother Pee". You are forever etched in our memory.
Your parting blessings and memories will be a treasure to me till the end of time.
Rest in perfect peace mom.
[Prince Clinton Uzodimma Ijebuonwu-Son]
Chapter11:
*Lamentations and Open letters*
My dear senior brother and senior sisters:
It is with a very heavy heart that I write this text to all of you this morning.
Relationships within our mother's kitchen have now degenerated to a very sour level since the beginning of this year and have no sign of improving in spite of all wise counsels.
Mama's recent decisions concerning her welfare and home have made me question whether I was born of the same parents with all of you or born a bustard in the family?
If you all agree to the stated fact that I am a full born child of Adolphus Nwazue (late) and Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu, I would then like to know from each of you what is due to me from our late father's estate as the second son from our mother?
I respectfully demand an answer to the above questions from Dede in particular within one week from today, and what steps he is going to take to avail me of my said rights from our father's estate?
I come in peace and do not seek any further confrontation with you or any of our sisters in this matter.
Please note that if you do not respond to this, my humble request as made, I may be left with no options than to invite either the larger Ijebuonwu, Umuonunaka, Umuobasi or Isiama Afaraukwu to seek redress in the matter.
I hope that this meets you and your families in good health.
Thanks
From me:
Orisa C. Ijebuonwu, Jr.
Sent to:
1. Da Alice Ukauwa
2. De Chiabuotu Ijebuonwu
3. Da Ejituru Onyeneho
4. Da Ebere Azuaru
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Re: Daa Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu
I am writing this to you with respect to my grandmother Daa Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu. Mama has been the PILLAR and cornerstone of this family, offering love and support to us all. That our family has not fallen apart is because of grandma's efforts.
I have been and still am embarrassed on your behalf. You and Aunty Ebere have caused her enough heartaches, enough pain. I have for a long time heard it all from mama, sadly.
Each time I placed a call across to her, she was always in deep thoughts asking me how she offended the two of you to have subjected her to this misery in her last days. It is very appalling, that the two of you who were champions of ensuring that she has a very peaceful transition in her last days on earth have now become the thorn tearing her heart to pieces.
Incase you have forgotten... that woman is your mum, like Mama.... the mother whose breasts you suckled, the one who still holds you dear to her heart and keeps saying over and over that she has forgiven you two for your misdeeds. The same mother who prays Psalm 91 every night over her children, grandchildren, great grandchildren and entire family.
If no one whose good books you are in has tried to point you to the truth, you should be sure that you are surrounded by people who do not have the fear of God in them.
Children obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. Honor your father and your "MOTHER", that it may be well with you and you may live long on earth. A deviation from this instruction brings the opposite to your doorstep speedily.
I refrained from reaching out to any of you but I just find it needful to do so at this point. It is indeed shameful.
I may not be the ideal person in your eyes, not that I care, in our family to bring this to your notice and remind you that Mama's last memories of you are sad, heart breaking, grievious and sorrowful.
You still have time to make amends with her and REPENT. Remember, your time on earth is not eternal. Her grandchildren are sitting and watching you two make a mess of a relationship you have so devoted your blood and sweat to over the years.
All we want is to give Mama a peaceful transition, and God forbid that the rest of the family will fold their arms and watch you two torture this woman to death.
Is it not absurd that you, her daughter, A DIRECTOR OF NURSING, who knows the delicate stage grandma is in, who time over time has insisted that we indulge Mama at this stage, and let her have and do whatsoever she desires, have turned around to wage war against her???
Or you my father, Chimzuorom as she calls you, who has been the major beneficiary of grandma's financial benevolence of all her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren have decided to break her heart to pieces for God knows what reason?
And you two expect it to be well with you?
I used to think that you two are decent and principled, but the events of recent times have consistently contrasted it.
To think that the two of you are her last two kids, and yet have no reverence for your elder siblings is appalling.
How do you expect us the younger generation to listen to you, respect and honor you???
For every day we received a negative report about you two, a page was torn from the regard and respect any of us had for you.
If this is what being advanced in age reveals about people, God help me never to take this path, because I must do better than this.
You have held on to her financial assets with tight fists and denied her access to her money, a product of her sweat and blood!!! Chai!! And you think posterity will be kind to you?? God our righteous judge will fight for Mama, a widow. It is indeed a fearful thing to fall into the hands of God.
In your bid to remain at the helm of affairs of this family, and make the rest of the family your footstool, you seem to forget that Mama's generation does not end with the two of you. We all are watching you unravel your very essence. We will be here when you get to grandma's age. Our prayer is that you do not receive this kind of harsh treatment you have subjected grandma to, when you get to your 90s.
DAMN IT!!!!
LET THIS WOMAN LIVE HER LAST DAYS IN PEACE!!!
That is really what she needs right now. She is not some pawn to be used to achieve some selfish end.
Posterity will not be kind to you two particularly for the pain you caused her. Stop with the politics you two are playing at.
Haven not you done enough,
have not you spread enough lies and falsehood? You are probably at a stage where you have started believing all the lies you spread as truth.
Are you not tired of all the hate and unending strife you keep promoting?
This is the nonsense you have subjected my grandmother to because of some useless and senseless power tussle.
You have the world in your hands so everybody else is under your feet.
STOP IT ALREADY!!!
Do not forget you would get to her age someday. I do not need to remind you of the Bible's stand on reaping a full harvest of what you sow.
Think about tomorrow, think about the future! Make amends where necessary and repent. Do not let pride, selfishness and ego rip you of your mother's final blessings. Is it really worth it?
Mama is in her late 90's and this is the best you all can do???
Chaiiiii!!!!!
Please ensure you send this message across to all your contacts as usual.
At this stage I really do not care what anyone thinks of me. If wishes were horses, I would ride off into regret, because I wish I had never had anything to do with you two.
NNEKA
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AN OPEN LETTER; A VERY LONG READ
To my cousins, I hope you all choose to seek and speak the truth in the interest of justice and fairness, regardless of whose ox is gored. The issues in the family as at today are deep-rooted and a couple of us are clueless and remain oblivious as to how we got here. In all honesty, this is just for posterity's sake. It would be on record that I spoke up; at least someone did.
Mama's wish was to be buried in her compound at a specific spot. However, Chief Orisa Ijebuonwu has blatantly refused to regard mama's wishes and has decided to go ahead and bury her right in the compound she ran away from few months to her demise. Reason being that Mama was cajoled to leave Chief Orisa's house, that she was kidnapped by Late Uncle B and Dada Ejituru from Chief Orisa's house. That my own grandma had dementia! Chai!!
Umunne m, did our grandmother ever strike you as one who was sick in the head?? Were Chief Orisa and Bose's hands bound when this event took place? Were they not both at home that fateful day Uncle B came to take grandma back to her house but refused to come out when he called on them? Did not grandma tell you, Chief Orisa that she wanted to go back to her house? And what was your response?? That you would die if grandma left your house!!
Even Daa Alice asked that grandma should not be taken to Chief Orisa's house in the first place.
Everyone of you on this platform, elders and children, who was aware of Grandma's last wishes and subsequent arrangement before her demise, and have refused to carry them out to the fullest, may you be judged accordingly.
For those of you who were aware and have denied having no knowledge, may God judge you accordingly.
For everyone who contributed to her pain directly or indirectly, causing her anguish and making her shed bitter tears in her transition moment, till her last breathe, may God take care of you.
Is it not shameful that in her last moments, Chief Orisa and Lady Ebere treated grandma unfairly, because she would not go back on her decisions due to very glaring circumstances?
Grandma's wishes were that "A STRANGE WOMAN (BOSE) SHOULD NOT STEP INTO HER COMPOUND AGAIN."
Chief Orisa, your wife swore that everyone who she had given money to would die. Hahahahaha! She gave my late grandma 5k and late Uncle B 5k... hahahahaha! Bose!!! I wonder who is next 🤔
Chief Orisa, as usual, you have always remained oblivious to bizzare situations under your roof, either by choice or ignorance, if not you would have known that grandma did not eat for 3 straight days because she was served soup that was garnished with water! Which I knew perfectly well, was different from the soup Bose served you. What was grandma's offence? That she asked Bose to apologise for the outburst and insult towards Mrs Emeruem and her mother. Grandma blatantly refused to eat what she was served in your house because she was being treated like a slave, unbeknownst to you but she did not complain to you. And everytime you asked if she had eaten, she would say yes.
Her need to leave Chief Orisa's house was because of
1. this ill treatment from Bose,
2. her need for her grandchildren to have unrestricted access to her (because of the sad event that transpired between Bose and Mrs Emeruem, Dada Ejituru's last daughter, and also because Chief Orisa walked Dada Ejituru out of his house and asked her to place a call across to him each time she wanted to come and see her mother, quite laughable),
3. she wanted her house to become a family house where everyone of her family could stay in each time they are in town,
4. Because she did not want anyone interfering in Chief Orisa's current marriage and did not want to be said to be the cause of it breaking apart as she had been accused over and over of being the one to break up his past marriages.
Grandma advised everyone to mind their business and stay away from Chief Orisa's marriage hoping and praying that it will work and that this will be his last bus stop. Need I say more?
Mama was not happy with Chief Orisa Ijebuonwu and Mrs Ebere Azuaru in the months preceding her demise. Part of Mama's last coherent words before her demise was that she did not do anything wrong to Orisa and Ebere to have deserved the kind of treatment they meted out to her. But that she has forgiven them. All she asked for was her money, to eat it when she was alive, yet they both withheld it from her. Your narrative is that she wanted to give the money to Dada Ejituru and Late Uncle Bolingo. Even if she wanted to, is it a crime? Have we all in the family not benefited financially from Grandma, especially Chief Orisa??
Would Chief Orisa or Lady Ebere appreciate any of their kids telling them how to use and spend their hard earned money or restricting them from having access to their money?
Now you want to give her a befitting burial. Do not get me wrong, mama deserves the world and more. Chief Orisa keeps telling all and sundry that he gave his mother 100k every month. Cheers Sir, we should applaud your benevolence towards grandma over funds that were hers but you chose to restrict her access to it.
If Adaeze or I were to withhold your funds from you and give you a token out of it because we did not want your other children to partake in it, would you feel happy about it?
Or if Chuck, Chib, Ugo or Jeff withholds Lady Ebere's funds from her against her wish, would it not further break her heart?
I am not surprised that the only person Bose has "respect" for in the family is Lady Ebere. A crown well befitting for the one who would never step in to make peace, but would move with every word that proceeds out of the mouth of Chief Orisa, and vice-versa. I think about the narrative of how Adaeze connived with Dada Ejituru and her daughter to cause commotion in Chief Orisa's house because she was angry not to have benefitted financially from your son, Jeffrey's wedding and from the catering job done for Ugochi your daughter, by a friend of ours. What a defaming, demeaning and nasty thought to conceive! It should not have seen the light of the day. You have a very dark, bitter and negative heart. Let it be known to everyone reading this that, you have never ever stepped in, to broker peace in any way, anytime issues come up. You always move with what Chief Orisa says with unflinching solidarity, not questioning the accuracy, truthfulness and correctness of the information you received. You are rather too quick to remind us of how my dad would rain curses on us.
It is sad that evil Bose has admiration and respect for you. The same Bose that told Adaeze that you hate my sister and I and you are envious of us. Those were her exact words to her. Envious of what? I certainly have no idea.
If I remember the past trying years, and how far we have come, I keep asking myself if Chief Orisa hid his true nature from his children, because this is clearly not the principled, loving, caring, family-oriented, kind and peaceful person we thought he was. Right now, all I see and percieve is a domineering, materialistic tyrant, who would want to subjugate and oppress everyone, very power-hungry and proud.
I have asked a few questions about what my late grandfather was like and the description I got about him is just the same as you are exhibiting.
Could it be that your later treatment of grandma reminded her of the abuse she suffered in the hands of your late father? A lot of thoughts are running through my mind. I cannot help but wonder.
I am a weapon fashioned against you all that refuse to stand by the truth.
Defend yourselves with your diplomatic words, sugar-coat the truth all you want, bully all you can into silence, but we have a God who seats in heaven and looks down on earth, He laughs and finds your actions amusing and mocks your futile attempts to cover the truth.
Lest I forget, a number of us are well aware of how close mama was to Uncle Prince, her grandson, even to the envy of her children. This same Uncle Prince that tried to broker peace in the family and Chief Orisa and his wife outrightly rebuffed his efforts and said they were not interested and that everyone should stay on their own and that time would take care of things. Time is indeed taking care of things.
It is a big shame to say the least, that at the expense of the possible unity of the family which was held together by the late Daa Helen Nwauru Ijebuonwu, you, Chief Orisa Ijebuonwu with the unflinching support of Lady Ebere Azuaru have decided to disobey mama's wish. You two just want to push some agenda hidden behind grudges that have lingered for God knows how long. Posterity will judge us all. We will never forget this.
In the near future, I wonder who the younger generation would look up to. You two are an exact opposite of peace, love, unity, equity, fairness and justice.
I took a chance when I visited you in December but I guess it is what it is.
I just want to let you all know that I will continue to spread the information as to what really transpired in the family so the world will know the truth as to what really happened, contrary to the false narrative being peddled to sycophants, SHAMEFUL!!! Oh yeah, I reached out to the Vicar of St. Andrews and filled him in on the reality of things, as there is more than meets the eye.
Finally, Chief Orisa, I ask that you advise Bose to cease the smear campaign against members of the family. Any more defamation from her tongue would incur serious wrath upon her and everything she holds dear. We are well aware of the altar that backs her, we have seen it. She is moving, raving mad and cares less about the evil she has brought to this family, but I declare in the name of the Lord that this negativity ends with your generation. God has started a cleansing and a wiping. And very soon, all men shall see it and know that indeed God is the Almighty.
There is no perfect family, that I know. But being a part of a family where the truth is hoarded, and those who know it refuse to tell it but claim to be children of God, is very nauseating as a thought.
Grandma, wherever you are right now, I believe you can see it all. You did not deserve to die the way you did, in pain and anguish that further deteriorated your health. You asked me to bring Okechi home for you in December, I put things in place in preparation for the trip and you bid us farewell in November. I had my cook book prepared to make my special delicacies for you. And the party you proposed to put up in YOUR compound this December never held. This void cannot be filled by any human at all. You are in a better place, I know that for sure. You called everyone of us by name that fateful Saturday afternoon/evening and blessed us. Your words to us and our children will remain indelible in our hearts. You see it all. May your spirit find rest in God's bosom and may it continue to fight the evil that has raised its head in our family until it is crushed.
Chief Orisa, please enjoy the befitting burial and the show you have prepared for our Grandma, as the firstborn son and firstborn daughter.
You guys have successfully bullied everyone who holds an opinion contrary to yours into silence because your agenda must be carried out.
If tables are turned and you were met with the type of humiliation you subjected your sister Dada Ejituru to, where you rained insults on her and walked her out of your compound,would you ever step foot into the same compound you were chased out of? Be careful of those cheering you and leading you into a pit you might never come out of in this life. I would watch my back if I were in this position. Your wife must be really proud of you 🙂.
I choose not to be part of this arrangement in any way.
Whenever we are "honestly" ready for that peace talk and reconciliation, I am game, but until then, I will see myself out!
NNEKA CRYSTAL IJEBUONWU
Pre-Burial Responsibilities
1. *Informing relatives*: The first daughter is expected to inform other relatives, especially maternal relatives, about the mother's passing.
2. *Coordinating funeral arrangements*: She assists in planning and coordinating the funeral rites, including selecting the burial site, choosing the casket, and arranging for transportation.
Burial Ceremony Roles
1. *Leading the procession*: The first daughter typically leads the funeral procession, accompanied by other female relatives.
2. *Performing traditional rites*: She participates in traditional rites, such as pouring libation, singing dirges, or performing other cultural ceremonies.
3. *Receiving condolences*: As the first daughter, she receives condolences and sympathies from mourners on behalf of the family.
Post-Burial Responsibilities
1. *Care for younger siblings*: She is expected to take care of her younger siblings, ensuring their well-being and providing emotional support.
2. *Managing the mother's property*: In some cases, the first daughter may be responsible for managing her mother's property, including distributing her belongings according to traditional customs.
3. *Preserving family traditions*: She is expected to preserve the family's cultural heritage and traditions, passing them down to her own children and younger relatives.
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February 10, 2025
Chief (Barr.) Orisa Ijebuonwu,
Umuobasi,
Isiama Afara,
Umuahia,
Abia State.
My dear Uncle Orisa,
Re: Open letter.
The above subject matter refers.
I am constrained to write you this open letter as a last resort.
I have engaged in several "behind the scene" deliberations with you in a bid to resolve the imbroglio the whole family has been thrown into since the demise of the matriarch of the family.
The deliberations referred to above did not yield positive results, hence the need to communicate my stand on the simmering issues publicly.
The issue of where Mama will be interred appears to be on the front burner at the moment.
I took the liberty to thoroughly investigate the numerous claims that Mama clearly instructed and identified the location of her resting place while alive, to be in her compound.
I was verily informed that Mama told the following individuals on a 'one on one' basis that she wanted to be buried in her compound:
1. Ikechi Ijebuonwu
2. Prince Ijebuonwu
3. Elizabeth Onyeneho
4. Adaeze Ijebuonwu
5. Nneka Ijebuonwu
6. Dancosta Ijebuonwu
7. Stanley Ijebuonwu
8. Mama's caregiver.
These individuals aforementioned are all alive today, and I challenge any one of them to controvert this assertion.
In essence, the veracity of the claim of Mama's choice of resting place is ascertained.
Sequel to the above information, the million dollar questions arising are as follows;
1. Why do you want to subvert Mama's wish and bury her somewhere else?
2. How can Mama rest in peace if she is interred in a place other than her chosen location?
3. Was the decision reached as a result of concerns that locating her grave in the premises will affect the economic value of the property or interfere with possible plans to employ the property for commercial purposes?
A dead person's Will in native custom and statutory law is sacred, and must never be interfered with.
It is wrong counsel in law and native custom to suggest that as the head of the family, a person possesses the powers to subvert the Will/ wishes of the dead.
Please, in reaching your final decision of choosing Mama's burial location, be guided by that fact that you cannot unring this bell once you ring it (Will you exhume her remains and bury her again if eventually you find out that you should have carried out her wishes?).
I hereby publicly dissociate myself, my wife, children and my mother from any plan to bury Mama anywhere other than her premises.
When the consequences of any plan to deny Mama the chance to rest in peace starts to rain in torrents, it will unfortunately fall heavily on those who actively planned the subversion and those who kept quiet in the face of it.
In the interest of the "naysayers" who may intend to kickstart the rumor mill that I am trying to cleverly absolve myself of any responsibility towards giving Mama a befitting burial, I had already donated N1,000,000 (One million naira) of my money towards Mama's burial before I heard the plans to bury her somewhere else.
Dear Uncle, entertaining and implementing wise counsel does not equate to weakness.
I implore you with the greatest respect to reconsider your decision to subvert Mama's wishes and to let her finally rest in peace.
Please, accept continued assurances of my highest considerations.
Your Nephew,
Mazi Kelechi Onyeneho (Snr.)
ATTENTION......Ref. TO WHOM IT MAY CONCERN:
February 10, 2025
Mazi Kelechi Onyeneho (Snr.),
My dear family members ,
I am writing to express my utmost disappointment and disgust at the recent letter. As the first grandchild of our beloved grandmother, I am appalled by any body's attempt to undermine our uncle's authority as the chief mourner.
Our uncle, Chief Orisa Ijebuonwu, has always acted in the best interest of our family, and I have no doubt that he will continue to do so in this matter. Any claims about our grandmother's alleged wishes are nothing but a thinly veiled attempt to manipulate and control, and its significance or better still awaiting consequences are perfect enmity .
I categorically reject the notion that our grandmother's wishes, as expressed to a select few, should be taken as gospel. Especially when I have consulted traditionally & customarily,yet nothing but a reflection of the divisive and manipulative tactics that have been employed to put the family in a petition of life enmity .
As the first grandchild, I am proud to stand in support of our uncle and his decision regarding the burial of our grandma,the same I would give to the next Mazi L.O. Nwazue,as the next in authority, hence I have been directed by the elders of the land and custom, it is an appeal!!!
. I therefore urge everyone to refrain from causing further division and strife within our family.
Instead, I suggest you focus on paying your respects to our grandmother and supporting our uncle during this difficult time.
Our culture and customs or tradition is clear on this matter .Our right here is limited , it is Chief ORISA IJEBUONWU'S mother and if my father were to be alive, nobody would have challenged his authority ...
We can not afford to lose another person as our days are numbered .
Let us bury our dead , everything else follow .
Bear in mind , that the chief Mourner needs our support prayerfully .
PEACE PROFOUND .
Sincerely,
Hon.Ikechukwu Christian Chiabuotu Jr .
(PRINCIPAL GRANDSON )
February 11, 2025
Hon. Ikechukwu C. Chiabuotu Jr.
Umuobasi,
Isiama Afara,
Umuahia,
Abia State.
My dear Ikechi,
Re: Setting the records straight.
First of all, my open letter was not addressed to you. However, since you elected to advertise your ignorance on a Jumbotron by taking personal jabs at me instead of making constructive reactions, I will gladly take the pleasure to put you in your place accordingly.
I have painstakingly perused your letter, and I must confess that I am highly impressed by your exceptional ability to compress such large volumes of inanities in such a short piece.
I am still befuddled by all the wild allegations you levelled against me in your piece.
How are my germane questions likely to create disunity in the family?
Did Mama tell you when she was alive that she wanted to be buried in her compound or not?
Why did you not controvert that assertion in my letter if it was not true?
Facts that are not challenged are deemed admitted, even in law.
So advocating for all of us to obey Mama's dying wish is now synonymous with creating disunity in your estimation?
Disappointed, disgusted and appalled. Really?
Ikechi, do I look like a tool that you can employ for your grandstanding and shenanigans?
The rumour mill is agog with news that the place you presently occupy, rightfully belongs to Uncle Orisa. Could it be that you are trying to use me to assuage and distract him from coming to take it from you? Do not ever try that with me.
Next time, I suggest you do your due diligence before assaulting my optical and cerebral sensibilities with the bouquet of misinformation you dumped on this platform with respect to native customs and traditions.
Let me give you some much deserved education on this subject that you have harped on pointedly.
A person's dying wish is sacrosanct and cannot be overridden by the whims and caprices of another.
You can only override a person's dying wish where an "Act of God" or "Force Majeure" renders it impossible to execute.
For example, if Mama's compound was completely eroded as a result of a landslide, earthquake or erosion, then alternative arrangements can be made.
Please, fact check me on the above statement.
What is the supervening act that makes it inconvenient or impossible to bury Mama in her compound and in accordance with her direction?
I think it is highly disingenuous to distort the true position of the law and customs for pecuniary reasons.
The word that comes to mind after reading your letter is 'subterfuge'.
It is clear to me that your views are self serving but masqueraded in the toga of a crusade for cohesion.
I make bold to tell you that you are ferociously fanning the embers of discord in the family by this solo and shameful campaign you have embarked on.
Honourable Ikechukwu C. Chiabuotu, I implore you to stand for the truth for once in your life, and do what is right by obeying the instructions personally given to you by our grandmother.
I rest my case.
Kind regards.
Mazi Kelechi Onyeneho (Snr.)
February 11th 2025,
Dee Ikechi,
With all due respect, if there is anyone fanning the embers of war here, it is you.
I have watched the role you have been playing since this whole brouhaha started and I cannot help but see through you and your devious intentions.
You seem to have a penchant for jumping in to respond to messages that were not directed at you. It is either you see this group as a platform to display your linguistic prowess or you just do not have regards or respect for other people’s feelings and opinions. Allow the people the messages were directed at to react and take the back seat for a minute.
You are not the mouthpiece of the gods.All these “ butt licking “ and canvassing isn’t because you care so much about anyone in this family but for your own selfish interest. It is glaring to everyone in case you do not know.
Where were you when several attempts at peace were made when the deceased persons were still alive?
Now you call grandma’s instructions “claims and alleged wishes”, really?
There is a big difference between a claim and facts. Did you not say Grandma pointed to you where she desired to be buried?
Why are you now talking from two sides of your mouth?
Now you call grandma’s instructions “claims and alleged wishes”, really?
There is a big difference between a claim and facts. Did you not say Grandma pointed to you where she desired to be buried?
Why are you now talking from two sides of your mouth?
You call yourself the “principal grandson “ a title without honor.
Because an alleged asset of yours is at stake, you have chosen to make yourself an object of ridicule just to be in Chief Orisa’s good books.
I am yet to see one significant role you have played since the history of this family, but you are quick to wear the badge of “a principal grandson”, a position without a single benefit.
Just so you know, grandma also duly informed us of how you coveted her funds so I am not surprised why you are all over the place constituting linguistic noise.
Feel free to respond to my message and one thing you will be guaranteed is a very deserving response from me.
Because an alleged asset of yours is at stake, you have chosen to make yourself an object of ridicule just to be in Chief Orisa’s good books.
I am yet to see one significant role you have played since the history of this family, but you are quick to wear the badge of “a principal grandson”, a position without a single benefit.
Just so you know, grandma also duly informed us of how you coveted her funds so I am not surprised why you are all over the place constituting linguistic noise.
Feel free to respond to my message and one thing you will be guaranteed is a very deserving response from me.
Nnamdi Onyeneho.
___________________________________________
***EPILOGUE***
The family finally came together, united in their grief and their determination to honor their matriarch's legacy. They worked through their differences, and slowly, healing began. The house, once a symbol of discord, became a place of warmth and connection, where stories of the past were shared and memories were created.
As we looked back on the journey, remembering the pain and the struggle, but also the love and the resilience. We knew that our grandmother's legacy lived on, not just in the physical sense, but in the lessons she taught, the love she shared, and the family she nurtured.
As we closed the chapter on one era, we began a new one, filled with hope, forgiveness, and a deeper understanding of the complexities of family. The matriarch's spirit continued to guide us, reminding us of the importance of love, unity, and the enduring power of family's bonds.
The story may be ending, but the legacy lives on, a testament to the transformative power of love and forgiveness.
*** OUTER BACK COVER ***
"A powerful and poignant novelette about the complexities of family, love, and legacy. When a beloved matriarch passes away, her family is left to navigate the aftermath of her passing, confronting secrets, lies, and long-held resentments. As they struggle to come to terms with their loss and honor her legacy, they must also confront their own flaws and fears.
Through the eyes of a devoted grandchild, this novelette explores the intricate web of family dynamics, the weight of legacy, and the enduring power of love. A story of resilience, forgiveness, and the unbreakable bonds that tie us together."
About the Author
"Prince Clinton Uzodimma Ijebuonwu, the matriarch's grandson, is a philosophical free thinker and storyteller who weaves unique insights into family dynamics through his narratives, drawing from personal experiences. With a background in Political Science , Public Administration and International Relations from Abia State University, Uturu, and certification in civil and criminal laws from the German Chamber of Industry and Commerce Munich Germany, Prince Clinton brings a thoughtful and introspective approach to his writing as a security and intelligence expert."
"Prince Clinton Uzodimma Ijebuonwu, the matriarch's grandson, is a philosophical free thinker and storyteller who weaves unique insights into family dynamics through his narratives, drawing from personal experiences. With a background in Political Science , Public Administration and International Relations from Abia State University, Uturu, and certification in civil and criminal laws from the German Chamber of Industry and Commerce Munich Germany, Prince Clinton brings a thoughtful and introspective approach to his writing as a security and intelligence expert."
May Mama’s soul continue to rest in peace
ReplyDeleteIn Jesus' name, Amen.
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